I feel hopeless and wann just stop living.

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I feel so done with life.

Can you think of anything that does give you hope? Anything you enjoy?

Nope. I’m a worthless unlovable loser.

The only sad pluse side is I don’t have to worry about keeping my stuff in good condition as no one will inherit any of it, it’ll all just be sold or thrown away.

I only hope I’ll die soon. Maybe I can buy a motorcycle and drive badly, motorcycles have a much higher death rate. People don’t watch for them.

Car came close yesterday but didn’t hit me

Or I may have to kill myself. My family will die and move one then I’ll be alone and homeless and I refuse to be that way.

Do you like cooking?

Going for a walk?

Films?

Books?

There must be something you can enjoy about life. One of the benefits of being disabled and less able to cope with work is having more time than most people to pursue your interests.

Not anymore.

I don’t and can’t walk alone do to anxiety and adhd. I enjoyed it when I had someone to walk with.

Not a lot of movies anymore. None of the classic Christmas movies are playing this year either, and all the new ones are all romantic Christmas movies bleh.

I don’t read books. Adhd.

Nope being alone makes everything I do pointless. I started collecting coins, but it’ll just be thrown away when I die. No one to leave it to. Last of my family. It’ll all be sold to a pawn shop or just turned into the police(guns) I do t even have friends to leave them to anymore. Reality is most people live life to share it with others and pass it down to their kids, everyone collecting coins is so they can pass them down or pay for their kids college. People talk about passing their family’s guns and her guns down as heirlooms.

Life alone is empty. It makes every activity empty.

I have Time to think about how worthless I am and how lonely I am. Though less then normal. I’m gone 8-9 hours for work. My online friends are going be leaving soon too then I won’t even have people to game with so I’ll stop gaming. Have more time to be depressed. Just wish some woman could like me and maybe I could have friends again. But that’s it how life works for a worthless sub human like me.

Now I know your lonely. But lonelyness is quite a common thing in our day and age. Just look at how many people come here saying they are lonely. I came here saying Im lonely too. If we cant find anyone to hang out with, we are just going to have to get used to it. Until someone comes along perhaps. Life doesnt seem that bad for you sly. I think you should try to be happy. Think of all the things you actually do have and focus on that and be greatful.

Yeah, Sly. Stop complaining, you selfish as*hole. Just be grateful for how lonely and empty your life feels. How dare you?

Pardon me, but I have to go cuddle with my partner who adores me. You have a great day, and remember to be thankful.










(that was all sarcasm, by the way)

sly, you must know that it is surprisingly, distressingly, difficult to make your body stop living. I know somebody who stuck a 20 ga. double-barrel shotgun in his mouth and toed the trigger. it did not have the expected effect, it just blew his nose off [and much of the rest of his face], but he survived, partially blinded, lacking a sense of taste and smell, judicially confined to a group home, knowing what he useta be, before he pulled the trigger. there are countless cases of people jumping off of buildings and bridges, only to have their landing softened by a gust of wind driving them into a body of water or an awning, bruised and bedraggled with broken bones but still very much alive and worse for the wear. the grand designer made it this way because he didn't want his creation offing themselves left and right on this hellworld he created for them to learn from.
a cleverer person than me [Dorothy Parker, a very depressed person herself] wrote this pointed little ditty-
"Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful; You might as well live."

Listen to Dio than, I mean IDK might not work for you but I found listening to Dio helped my depression, he is dead now, but his music can live on and it is uplifting.

But seriously listen to him....

I have terrible anxiety and socially isolate, currently single, jobless, in debt, etc.
When I ride motorcycle though my ADHD, and everything else is stimulated. I feel better when riding. And sure cars don't watch for you, but it keeps your brain busy having to think on their behalf, thus getting yourself / myself out of my head and constant thoughts. So maybe getting a motorcycle isn't such a bad idea.

I like you sly you're cool.

Can't say I know what to tell you, I hope you find some peace and understanding

This may sound very cynic but just posting in-case it helps. If you have nowhere to turn to, even if you aren't religious at all, go to church. I'm an agnostic but I've seen what religion has done for individuals who feel like they have nowhere to turn to and simply don't have much to believe in. The community alone can be a very positive thing, there are also tons of story's of wisdom and people to learn from

I wish people would take the positive things, you know eat the meat and spit out bones but sometimes consuming the wrong messages make it a negative. Use it if you need it

Doctor John Glowin'
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CbkjA9K5U0E

Sly, I don't want to diminish what you are feeling, but I feel like that most of the time.

There are very few peaks on my journey, mostly a lot of hard climbing. So, it sounds terrible, but I live for one or two moments every month or so that restores me temporarily.

I was in a bad place just a few days ago. Long story short, I was going to lose my job unless I completed some bureaucratic paperwork, and it was received by the state before Thursday at 3pm.

I had the paperwork done months ago, but I thoroughly do not understand how the mail operates. I stood in line at the post office for about an hour (which in itself is infuriating), and I was just about to have an Aspie meltdown when the lady behind the counter called me. I decided to make myself vulnerable, and I simply told her "I am Autistic, and I don't understand how mail works, but someone has to have this information before Thursday at 3pm."

I swear this woman was a saint. She did not add an consoling wisdom or some story about her son/grandson/nephew/etc. who is autistic. She very calmly walked me through the process, printed the address, put my documents in a Priority envelope, stamped the envelope, and explained how to track the letter. Then, she charged me the $6 it cost, and told me to have a nice day.

It's very likely that she has no idea what she did, but she saved my life. Losing my job likely would have meant moving back in with my mother and a million other things that at my age I was not willing to do or go through again.

So, I don't have any conclusions, Sly. But, there are moments that lighten the burden of living. I wish there were more of them, and I wish they occurred more frequently and more regularly. But, that's not how it is for me.

Do you play online games?