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rogueone
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04 Jan 2018, 7:19 am

So I'm preparing to go back to UNI and I'm incredibly scared about it.

I think I've come to a sad realization, I feel like I'm much happier when I'm on my own....I feel so bad about this...apparently I was told when I was younger I didn't like playing with other kids in primary school and was much happier playing in the sandbox by myself.

I almost don't really want people to know the real me....cause the real me is emotional as and hard to listen to.......I feel like I'm probably just going to go to the classes then go home as soon as it's done. I don't think I'll go to O-Week either, I don't like talking about myself at all.

Is it bad to not really like social events and socializing?



magz
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04 Jan 2018, 7:29 am

rogueone wrote:
Is it bad to not really like social events and socializing?

Not at all. It's your way. Perfectly valid and totally OK.


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elsapelsa
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04 Jan 2018, 7:35 am

Yes agree totally ok. But it is extra good to know yourself well enough to know that this is the case and extra good to be kind enough to yourself to accept it.


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04 Jan 2018, 9:48 am

Abseloutely not. If you asked most people "is it OK that I've no interest in chemistry?" they'd probably say "of course." It's in our best interest that not everyone is interested in the same thing, that makes the world more interesting.


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04 Jan 2018, 9:57 am

It's not wrong at all. I can tell you from experience that you should probable try to do it anyway; especially while you are still young, and going to a place where other people are young and open to new friendships.
It will be harder to break into social scenes later on if you don't have some sort of network of people behind you.



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04 Jan 2018, 10:54 am

Moved to new location after 911....still haven't gotten past the acquaintance stage with people here.



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04 Jan 2018, 12:49 pm

Of course there's nothing wrong about not liking it. Those of us who don't might be a minority, but that doesn't make it wrong.
We're not hurting anyone by being asocial (not to be confused with antisocial, which means something very different).


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04 Jan 2018, 3:42 pm

rogueone wrote:
Is it bad to not really like social events and socializing?


I don’t think so, but that doesn’t mean other humans won’t try to make you feel badly about it, unfortunately. :evil:



rogueone
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04 Jan 2018, 10:51 pm

It's not like I hate people....it's just I feel like social situations are way to stressful and make me feel worse about things



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04 Jan 2018, 11:40 pm

rogueone wrote:
It's not like I hate people....it's just I feel like social situations are way to stressful and make me feel worse about things

Seems like you're just like most of us here on WP.

For me, it's a bit of a catch 22. I don't like socializing, and if I go to a social event, I'm likely to find it either boring or stressful (or both!), and I usually spend most of the time looking forward to it ending.

But at the same time, if I go through an entire weekend with almost no social contact, I tend to find myself feeling depressed. So I don't like social contact, but at the same time, I clearly need at least some of it!
:wall:


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04 Jan 2018, 11:44 pm

SplendidSnail wrote:
rogueone wrote:
It's not like I hate people....it's just I feel like social situations are way to stressful and make me feel worse about things

Seems like you're just like most of us here on WP.

For me, it's a bit of a catch 22. I don't like socializing, and if I go to a social event, I'm likely to find it either boring or stressful (or both!), and I usually spend most of the time looking forward to it ending.

But at the same time, if I go through an entire weekend with almost no social contact, I tend to find myself feeling depressed. So I don't like social contact, but at the same time, I clearly need at least some of it!
:wall:


Me too.



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05 Jan 2018, 5:19 am

rogueone wrote:
So I'm preparing to go back to UNI and I'm incredibly scared about it.

I think I've come to a sad realization, I feel like I'm much happier when I'm on my own....I feel so bad about this...apparently I was told when I was younger I didn't like playing with other kids in primary school and was much happier playing in the sandbox by myself.

I almost don't really want people to know the real me....cause the real me is emotional as and hard to listen to.......I feel like I'm probably just going to go to the classes then go home as soon as it's done. I don't think I'll go to O-Week either, I don't like talking about myself at all.

Is it bad to not really like social events and socializing?


I was (am still) the same way when I was younger and in preschool I was kicked out because I was too aggressive with the other kids and just wanted to be left alone.

When I went to college for Journalism Arts I tried to be as social as I could the first year and things seem to be going well but during the second year of my program I pretty much concentrated all on work and social life amongst my peers, and there were 90 of them, were pretty much neglected and they resented me and I came out with a 3.97 GPA and a whole bunch of enemies.

I would say the best thing you can do is to concentrate on your studies because you're going to pay a lot of money for that education and that's why you're there. You're not there to socialize like you did in high school. Or didn't.


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05 Jan 2018, 11:43 am

xatrix26 wrote:
rogueone wrote:
So I'm preparing to go back to UNI and I'm incredibly scared about it.

I think I've come to a sad realization, I feel like I'm much happier when I'm on my own....I feel so bad about this...apparently I was told when I was younger I didn't like playing with other kids in primary school and was much happier playing in the sandbox by myself.

I almost don't really want people to know the real me....cause the real me is emotional as and hard to listen to.......I feel like I'm probably just going to go to the classes then go home as soon as it's done. I don't think I'll go to O-Week either, I don't like talking about myself at all.

Is it bad to not really like social events and socializing?


I was (am still) the same way when I was younger and in preschool I was kicked out because I was too aggressive with the other kids and just wanted to be left alone.

When I went to college for Journalism Arts I tried to be as social as I could the first year and things seem to be going well but during the second year of my program I pretty much concentrated all on work and social life amongst my peers, and there were 90 of them, were pretty much neglected and they resented me and I came out with a 3.97 GPA and a whole bunch of enemies.

I would say the best thing you can do is to concentrate on your studies because you're going to pay a lot of money for that education and that's why you're there. You're not there to socialize like you did in high school. Or didn't.


If only more people focused on their studies, then maybe they'd be more knowledgeable in their fields and perform better on the job.



TheAvenger161173
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05 Jan 2018, 2:39 pm

I hate socialising. even with good friends it makes me anxious, saying that I have occasions where I enjoy it but it has to be the right friends in the right scenario. At Christmas I stop at my girlfriends where i stay upstairs out of the way while everyone else is down stairs doing xmas things etc Same happened at new years eve I stayed upstairs out of the way while they all partied down stairs. my girl friend usually flitters between myself upstairs bringing me snacks etc haha and her family down stairs. I'm really lucky as they are really awesome people and don't mind at all,they make my Christmas. I suppose its being comfortable with it, in the past with girl friends ive had to meet there families and make an effort to be normal. I'm lucky I now have a girlfriend who understands me and her mam is pretty awesome too. Her understanding came early in the relationship one of the first dates where I started to have a panic attack while we were out. She spotted what it was straight away. So in answer to your question I don't think its wrong. Its natural to me to not like it, saying this I spend a lot of my days on my own it can become a bit much if I spend too long on my own. If I'm socialising once a week that's enough



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05 Jan 2018, 2:46 pm

It is unusual, but not wrong. At University, students have to choose two out of three on Social life, Sleep, and Study. It sounds as if you will get a better education than most. However, you can get educated at the library - what I miss about not having gone to school is getting comfortable with the kind of people who run things.