My mom doesn't understand my Aspergers

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She doesn't understand the challenge and the constant "relearning" of things.
Then she gets angry because I refuse help. God I would love help, but what she tries to do is to fix me. She has to understand that Aspergers is not going away, it's not a phase. It's terribly real. I'm not exaggerating or being too "sensitive" when getting panic attacks being in an overwhelmingly loud room, it's truly painful. It's not about the big things, it's about the million little things that are insignificant for other people and that are a life challenge for me. On a day to day basis, minute per minute.
And the taking things literally makes me feel so dumb. I just had to put it out there, to get it out of my system.

i wasn't aware it was even possible to make a username that long and cumbersome.


hopefully the rest of your family is more understanding and you don't have to depend on your mom for much. i have given up on convincing those close to me, myself.

Um nice username?
As kiprobalhato said, how much do you have to rely on your mother? Do you have professional help?
I know my mother needed to hear it from a doctor to truly believe my diagnosis.

Yeah, I also noticed that to...but I didn't want to say anything.

To the op, I too have issues with my mother when it comes to that sort of stuff. I hope you'll find a way to make things work out for you or even have others in your life who can support and understand you. I'm sorry for what you're going as well as I apologize for not really having answers for this sort of thing.

I have similair problems and no clue how to deal with them.

About the username - it's hilarious to see how that is spelled in any other language than swedish. I call her Pippilotta Viktualia Rullgardina Krusmynta Efraimsdotter Långstrump XD

Anyways, Your mother obviously needs to be educated in one way or another. Would she be willing to read a book, or at least watch a video on the subject? Or, if you're seeing a therapist or something, maybe it would be possible to arrange a session where your mother could come along and learn a thing or two?
My dad wouldn't even believe me when I first told him I got my diagnosis. Showing the paper didn't help. But he's slowly starting to accept it, as I've been carefully poking him with micro-facts here and there. Like "hey, you know how I always used to hide in small dark spaces? Yeah, light and sound sensitivity. Still got that."
When he starts connecting my behaviour in childhood to how I am now, it gets easier for him to see how this has always been a part of me, and always will be.

Hello Pippilotta Viktualia Rollgardina Pfefferminz Efraimstochter,
I wasn't Autistic until I read your user name. Just kidding.
I am aware that a percentage of Autistic people would love to be just like our friends the NT's.
I have often thought the same, but what the hell! We are as we are and we are darn wonderful people.
I love being Aspie because I have so many strengths as I am sure you and many others do.
I have made a decision that I am not going to try and change to fit in with the NT world, I am Bob; I am Autistic and I am awesome.
Sure I have communication issues and as a result I am not able to chat away for ever whist I am with a group of people.
But hey ..... s**t happens.
Much love ...... Bob

Love your username re-reading Astrid Lindgren's books as an adult has made me think she doesn't have a single neurotypical character in there, does she?

I'm sorry your mother doesn't empathize with or try to understand you. I think there are really only two options at this point. One is getting her to educate herself about aspergers, find some books written by people with aspergers about their experiences, and some about the point of view of those that work with people with aspergers, psychologists, therapists, etc. If you can't make her buy the books, buy them yourself, or find free versions of them online and download them. Stress to her the importance of her learning about it, and how you are feeling about how she is acting towards you.

The other, is both of you going to therapy, someone that works with people with aspergers. She might need to hear it from another person, that she's not going about things the right way. You can also look to some family members to tell her this.

In regards to the loudness, have you tried the kind of special noise cancelling headphones people with autism often use? It could help, it sounds like she doesn't empathize at all. If there isn't a therapist you can talk to, talk to a guidance couselor at school.

My mom is the same way despite having proof of it. I think some people are just incapable of understanding it, or at the very least try a little harder to be patient at leased. I could go on for hours about the amount of arguments ive had with my family simply because they misinterpreted somthing I said or did.

Unfortunately, there is probably no way to explain it to her if she doesn't want to understand... But maybe you can try to make up for it by other things, like helping her with the household chores, being a good student, taking care of your grandparents etc.
Do you have a father, a grandparent or an older sibling who understands you and is supportive to you?
My father was a big support to me in my teenage years, he gave me advices, encouraged me to pursue my interests and most importantly he didn't judge me and call me a problematic child, because he trusted me that I was a brave and a kind-hearted girl in my own way.

Pippilotta Viktualia Rollgardina Pfefferminz Efraimstochter. Wow that is quite a name young lady. I was trying to decipher it. Pfefferminz is peppermint in the Luxembourgish language. Efraimstochter is Efraim's daughter in German.

Still something is missing. Aw! it is your last name which is Langstrumpf.

So your full name is Pippilotta Viktualia Rollgardina Pfefferminz Efraimstochter Langstrumpf Or the short version. Welcome aboard Pippi Longstocking.

I love the Pippi Longstocking books!

I know what it's like to be smart and feel "dumb." When I can't do little things, it really frustrates me.