I'm black and white too, ultimately I see lying as wrong. However, as I've grown up, I've found that my definition of lying has moved into more a grey area.
For example, after much deliberation, I decided to lie to my children about santa claus. Not outright, when my eldest asked me straight up "does santa exist?", I told him the truth. In fact I spent ages thinking about what to tell him, then explaining the spirit of christmas and everyone's truth is different and that the magic exists in a much more complex way, he of course got bored and wondered off...
Another example is social niceties, I pretend to enjoy social events and smile and say good morning to people, which is all a lie. I also decided to lie to people to make them feel better, saying things like "yes, that's a great achievement" or "what a cool haircut". But then I would see people saying the same things, but meaning it, even when I did not.
I still believe harmful lies, or lies for selfish reasons are wrong, but after a few hiccups in the truth or lie area, what I realized is that most of the time, there is no universal truth. There is only opinions. So I'm not lying when I say "what a cool haircut" because other people genuinely think that to be true. I'm simply not choosing to share my precise opinion because it is hurtful. So rather than see things like this as telling a lie, I consider the motivation behind it instead.
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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 174 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 38 of 200
The Ritvo Autism Asperger Diagnostic Scale-Revised (RAADS-R) 195.0