outcast in my own family? not close with my siblings

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For a long time I have felt like I dont even fit in with my family, like they dont understand me. Lately I am trying to build friendship with my siblings, I want to have a deep connection.

Good on you for trying. My relationship with my family is not necessarily typical, but I can't complain.

I don't think this is an aspie only issue. So many people don't get along with their family. They might be your family but they're still other people. Nobody is obligated to understand you. Siblings who don't fight about everything are rare. Only those with big age gaps seem to get along well. Nearly everyone I know complains about their brothers and sisters.

My brother and I never shared about anything. The last time we talked was a few months ago about the local weather. We live only 15 minutes away from each other. A quote from a Harry Potter book "years of solid dislike" about sum it up. My dad has seen his sisters 3 times in his adult life. They don't even write to each other. Actually his sisters are illiterate, and my dad has a phD. They just don't have much in common. My husband claims he loves his sisters, but they don't see each other or call or write. Christmas cards are their only contact.

I'm not trying to irritate you. It's a perspective thing. Just saying I hope your existing relationship with your siblings are already tons better than what I experienced. If you've talked to any of them for more than 5 minutes total in the last year, you're already doing much better than some of us. Deeper connections might be possible, but it would take luck and willingness from all parties to have a chance.

I NEVER had a close realtionship with my parents or any of my other relatives. I was in my head too much & my parents were very critical of my Aspie issues/quirks & I have other mental & physical disabilities that my parents did NOT understand & were critical of. I'm an only child so I cant relate to that OP

I always seem to have been the black sheep. I am 56 years old and decided, finally, about 5 years ago to not even bother trying now.

Turning up at your parents house to find that they and your siblings with their families are having a party.

Father never ever having said he was proud of me or congratulating me on anything, mother being the good little wife who can't stand up to him. He's dead now, 2 years ago, and what a relief it is not to be trying to get a "Well done" out of him any more.

I am going through the same thing. I do love my family, and I recognize that I wasn't perfect. So I have alot to forgive them for and I'm sure I've done some things that need forgiving. I think it's big of you to try and connect. i think it shows growth. i know its not easy