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Emu Egg
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25 Mar 2019, 10:38 am

I'm 24, male and a virgin who has never had a girlfriend. It's a constant source of grief. I've been depressed and suicidal on and off for years. I feel like I'm in a pit that's impossible to climb out of. I don't have the slightest clue what to do to change my situation. Women are disgusted and creeped out by my social retardation. I don't know if it's possible to unbreak myself or if I'm hardwired to be a nervous, socially ret*d mess forever. If it's the latter what is the point of living and trying? The older I get it's only going to get worse.



Prometheus18
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25 Mar 2019, 11:09 am

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What exactly is it that's the problem? Eye contact? Small talk? Just shyness?



Arganger
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25 Mar 2019, 12:54 pm

You will live. You are only 24.
My uncle who is NT didn't have much luck with relationships until his forties.


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Suspected; PTSD (Treated, as my counselor did notice), possible PCOS, PMDD, Learning disabilities (Sure of it, unknown what they are), possibly something wrong with immune system (Sick about as much as I'm not) Possible EDS- hyper mobility type (Will be getting tested, suggested by doctor) dysautonomia


The_Face_of_Boo
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25 Mar 2019, 1:06 pm

^ Why people always mention uncles in these stories.



Fnord
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25 Mar 2019, 2:54 pm

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sly279
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25 Mar 2019, 3:02 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
^ Why people always mention uncles in these stories.

Why is spending half your life and the best part of your life alone seen as good.
Hearing my unlace or grandpa or whatever didn’t find anyone until their 40/50/60/70etc just makes me more depressed not hopeful


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AquaineBay
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25 Mar 2019, 3:14 pm

Yes we are all doomed because I cast the spell "Doom" on everyone. In 5 turns everyone dies(1 "turn" = 5 years).

Seriously though you aren't doomed. I'm 24 myself(25 next month) and I haven't had a girlfriend before and I'm still a virgin(though I guess different for you cause I don't really care about sex.)

The depression and suicidal thoughts would definitely be things that will hold you back from achieving those goals though. May I ask, what in your life is causing you to be depressed?

It would be ironic if I so happen to die at 49/50 years of age. :P


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Emu Egg
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25 Mar 2019, 9:41 pm

sly279 wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
^ Why people always mention uncles in these stories.

Why is spending half your life and the best part of your life alone seen as good.
Hearing my unlace or grandpa or whatever didn’t find anyone until their 40/50/60/70etc just makes me more depressed not hopeful

This is right. I'd rather die than wait until my 40s.

Quote:
What exactly is it that's the problem? Eye contact? Small talk? Just shyness?

All of the above. Shyness, fear of women, anxiety, low self esteem.

Quote:
The depression and suicidal thoughts would definitely be things that will hold you back from achieving those goals though. May I ask, what in your life is causing you to be depressed?

Being alone, being an old virgin, feeling inadequate as a person because of it, watching everyone else have what I haven't been able to, and feeling like I'm powerless to change it.



Zack1994
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25 Mar 2019, 10:09 pm

Maybe right now you are having a hard time in life finding a girlfriend, but maybe sometime later in life you will find one. I have to learn this too as I am also 24 years old, depressed, and a virgin.



kraftiekortie
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25 Mar 2019, 10:39 pm

What are you interested in, Sam?



enz
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25 Mar 2019, 11:52 pm

Vipassana might help you with confidence and interacting with people. It might be something to look into



The_Face_of_Boo
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26 Mar 2019, 1:02 am

Let’s play Doom.
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Sabreclaw
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26 Mar 2019, 3:48 am

It's pretty damn depressing every other one of your siblings gets into relationship stuff by 15.



elkclan
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26 Mar 2019, 3:57 am

If I were younger.... I would be totally dismissive of this maybe you'll find love in your 40s thing, too. But I'm in my LATE 40s and FINALLY finding someone who makes me really, really happy after years of loneliness and a terrible marriage and honestly I can only see the future really.

Sometimes we do the what if game and wonder what would have happened if we'd found each other earlier, but rarely. I have the love life I want and the sex life I never dreamed was possible. I'm just incredibly grateful.

BTW - my partner was 23 maybe when he lost his virginity?



kraftiekortie
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26 Mar 2019, 5:48 am

Yeah...it does happen pretty often. Congratulations, Elkclan!

I howl in tribute!



The_Face_of_Boo
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26 Mar 2019, 6:19 am

elkclan wrote:
If I were younger.... I would be totally dismissive of this maybe you'll find love in your 40s thing, too. But I'm in my LATE 40s and FINALLY finding someone who makes me really, really happy after years of loneliness and a terrible marriage and honestly I can only see the future really.

Sometimes we do the what if game and wonder what would have happened if we'd found each other earlier, but rarely. I have the love life I want and the sex life I never dreamed was possible. I'm just incredibly grateful.

BTW - my partner was 23 maybe when he lost his virginity?



23 is not late for losing it, at least in my world.