Nobody believes my psychiatrist (or me)

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Hello everyone!

What did your diagnosis process look like? What do you think about mine?

I found info, took online tests, and mapped my symptoms for my psychiatrist. He heard me out and said, "yeah, you're aspie." Some examples that come to mind: taking jokes literally, missing nonverbal ques, asking for social information directly, echolalia (ex: I read "chicken bacon" somewhere and it's so fun to say that I do like 25 times a day), twiddling my jewelry, social anxiety, social exhaustion, high-pitched voice, tendency to walk on the balls of my feet, thinking before I communicate (including nonverbal communication), mirroring social behavior, and special interests (I only speak tedtalk style). I also have sensory sensitivity to textures, light, and sound. I almost passed out at a crowded light show and I can't wear certain fabrics at all.

So my family and friends brush it off.. They think I'm making excuses for myself or overthinking it. As a female, I learn to mask and mirror "normal" social behavior even though socializing is exhausting. I am a completely different person when I'm alone with my fiance (repeating chicken bacon and doing stretches and playing repetitive phone games for HOURS).

Honestly, I'm looking for validation. If you think I'm overthinking it, too, let me know. I'm so confused and frustrated. I've been stuck on this for 2 years.

I completely believe it. That sort of perverse reply that you get from your family and others really just comes down to a self-serving bias, that they adamantly refuse to believe that any psychological disorder exists (which is taboo), so they skirt around the issue by accusing the sufferer of being "lazy", or "making excuses", or "not trying hard enough", which are all subjective value judgments and don't reflect reality.

When I first got diagnosed in 2001, while still well within my twenties, I told my father about it and he was very accepting and said "this explains this and that about you, it makes sense" and he validated my upset about it. As a result, I didn't sink into a victim mentality, I was ever more driven to succeed in life - which I did by any NT measure.

As the Nobel laureate Vernon Smith (who's got Aspergers) once claimed, there needs to be more moral support of those with the condition so that they can have the things in life that they deserve. So *I* support you in your struggle, even if your taboo-skirting family doesn't

@Jayo, thank you for the support. I'll take it!

I got really burned out after a period where I worked 2 jobs, went to school full-time and presided over the honor society, all in a new city. My family somehow thought that was normal for me?

I stepped back since 2017. I switched to flexible work (Doordash) and found an online program of study. My bachelor's degree will be done soon, and I got a long way with my mental health.

Being aspie, for me, means that I can love people from a distance. I don't want to socialize every day or even every week. My personal time is where I find energy and relief and I'm not letting anyone or any situation take it from me again. *That's really the part they don't want to accept*

Chicken bacon, chicken bacon! Aww, that's cute.

I'm sorry your family doesn't understand. Lacking their support can be hurtful.

Autists and Asperger's are special people. They don't want you to be autistical because they don't want to feel diminished.

Differences mean that they (neurotypicals) have to convert a message they cannot understand into a simplification that resonate with their limited viewpoint. Each reasoning help them see a new piece of puzzle of the bigger picture. But it takes time and patience in order to make most of them resonate.

They just do not accept that they've been cheated a long time ago. For them, it's a question of pride. You see where I go ? They feel pride by not allowing others to be themselves.

Why do you want validation from WrongPlanet? Isn't validation what you got from the doctor?

You haven't really given a lot of details about your evaluation. You say the doctor "heard you out" and then agreed that you're an "aspie." Doctor could have been using the ICD-10, but what he said seems a bit weird because Asperger's Syndrome was removed from the DSM.

Also you haven't mentioned anything about him giving you tests or questionnaires or asking for a developmental or educational history. It almost seems like you did nothing but talk to the doctor and he agreed with you without any further neuropsychological evaluation. If so, that was an unprofessional evaluation.

I suggest that you seek truth and accuracy rather than validation. All anyone here can say is "yes, your behavior seems consistent with Asperger's Syndrome."

Sounds like you had “a lot on your plate.”

I couldn’t work two jobs and go to college. I went to part-time college while I had one job.

What did you do with the Honor Society?

It’s not that I don’t “believe” you. It’s that what you were doing would stress out anybody.