Am I Being Too Literal , Pedantic or Anal Retentive

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As part of my treatment I was asked to fill in a planner for my weeks activities. I asked to clarify if it was to be a record of things I want to do or have done. I was told it was things I have done so I said more like a diary than a planner. This made the person seem a little irate and they said we call it a planner here. When I was emailed a template of the planner is was titled 'Diary Adapted Simplest' and the accompanying message read "Please find attached a diary/planner (whatever you want to call it)" .

Was I being too literal , pedantic , anal retentive or something else ?

I agree with you.

If you're in therapy then either thing might be relevent, but for hugely different reasons. So its important to know which way they wanna go with helping you.

If the goal is for you to record what happens to you each day - perhaps to find out what daily issues you have -with people- then it makes sense to keep a diary. And a diary is filled in after the fact.

If the goal is to..instill you with being efficient and business-like and they want to train you to keep track of appointments, and list your goals, and tick off tasks for the week, then that means that you fill it in before the fact with your aimed at goals. In which case it would be a "planner".

Granted that in Staples the section that has the "date books" usually has a sign that says "diaries/planners". So the words are used somewhat interchangeably. But its kinda important for your therapy if you know which thing they are stressing (the planning, or the after the fact record keeping).

No, you weren't. Had the therapist been totally clear with you in their desription of what they wanted from you, you wouldn't have been left questioning yourself. Try to put it behind you. They may have been having a stressful day, and had reached their limit? Main thing is that you gain from this therapy and see improvements in your life.

You were not being too literal, pedantic, or anal-retentive.

However, the staff person probably got irate because it wasn't really necessary for you to say that the record was more like a diary than a planner. It wasn't necessary because she had already clarified what you were supposed to do with it; what it's called doesn't really matter as long as you know what to do. And she may have thought that you were criticizing their terminology.

The staff honestly overreacted. You weren't doing anything wrong by just asking them clarifying questions, and even if they got annoyed, choosing to get "irate" and then passive aggressive in the e-mail really is sort of bizarre.

First of all, asking for a clarification when something is unclear is smart.

Secondly, I don't think most people can handle being called out/corrected for their improper/vague language use, so I can see why the therapist got snippy, although that's pretty unprofessional behaviour. I think a more reasonable response from the therapist would have been to just agree with your definition.

Thirdly, to me planner means planning ahead, whereas diary means keeping record of what happened after the fact. Granted, English is not my first language so I might be missing some nuances here.

Thanks for the replies , very helpful.
I think I may of been too hung up on terminology and was possibly passive/aggressive by correcting the terminology.
You live and learn.

I don't get how "planner" describes a record of something already done. The only confusion I can think of is that both of these things -- records and plans -- can be written in a notebook, so this person has substituted "planner" for the notebook itself. Ultimately I think you're in the right here to ask questions and to clarify and even correct them, because this is confusing terminology and they need to see that.

there are many so called professionals that are NTs that do not have adequate command of
useage of the english language , and do not like being caught in their own ignorance .
kinda like not being adequate to fill the job they are in .

On the 'Other - please comment what' option in the poll, I'm pretty much able to avoid being too literal; yet I sense that those overlooked subtleties can sometimes give the impressions of being too literal.

You knew the meaning of some relatively simple English words. They did not. They were being sloppy. You were not.

Justfoundhere revived a six month old thread. So the original poster has moved on from this topic.

But I agree with...myself above, and with everyone else above.

A therapist might want to to train an aspie in executive skills. So...getting a "planner" would make sense.

But a therapist might also want to know what the patients days are like, and how they interact with folks. So a "diary" could also be a mandatory. Either thing might make sense. So it makes sense to specify.

Your question makes sense to me. I would asked the same questions about the planner.

Even the giving most subtle literal / pedantic impressions can prove to be those social faux pas.

I've had (sleep) dreams of such social faux pas!

No problem here, you were accurate and they were not.

There is a mental health charity in the UK called Mind who do this kind of thing all the time.

So for example my internet connection is too poor to support Zoom or Skype. I am on the waiting list for their "Living with Autism" course. They sent me a text message recently saying that due to Covid-19 their next course would be online, please text back if interested. So I did not text back as I cannot participate online. A week later the lady running the course sent another text, bemoaning my lack of reply. And then got mad when I pointed out she was admonishing me for following the instructions they'd given, which to my mind is very rude.

They need to give better instructions.