Time and space, a reflection on the nature of change.

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I have a bad habit. I like to revisit locations where I had an old routine where I was happy. Inevitably, even the best routines can get disrupted in one way or another. To help cope with the loss of it, I try to return to the areas around that place in hopes of reigniting the hope it brought me.

In one particular case I lived in a college dorm 2018-2019. For a myriad of personal reasons, I quit going to that university. However, the routine I had there was extremely consistent and comfortable. So I decided the other day I'd go to the campus, walk around, see if I can relive the good days.

Only one problem- I didn't live there, but also, it was dead due to lockdown. No people anywhere. What was once a place teeming with life and things to do was now a ghost town. As I walked around in the campus outside, it was completely empty. The snow really finished off the desolate scene. This was not the place I knew. In a way, this disheartened me.

The experience reminded me that life is so much more than a location. It's that location in a distinct state, and that state is finite. It was a reminder of the cyclical ever changing nature of reality. And frankly as somebody who finds it difficult to cope with that, it freaked me out.

I decided I'd share this here, maybe others can relate.

I get that, yes. Space and memory are tied together for me too, sometimes stronger, sometimes weaker. But if the space changes drastically, then some memory of it is lost.

It is a strange thing, indeed.  My own hometown has not changed much geographically in the last 60 years -- same streets, buildings, and landscape.  It is the people who have changed.  The last time I visited, no one seemed to remember me, my siblings, or my parents.  I half-expected Rod Serling to do a voice-over at any moment...