Negative title and description game, A through Z

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I've been thinking about what the opposite of the title "Dude, where's my car" would be, namely "Dude, where isn't my car?!" and how perhaps it could be like a post-apocalyptic story about a guy finding out his car was at ground zero and is now fallout.

So, for starters, with the letter A:

Original title: Aliens.
Negative title: Non-Aliens.

Description: Ripley actually turned out to be crazy for real, but the company was doing Vault-Tec style experiments with gasses to see how much havoc they could create aboard their ships. Everything else was a dream, except the hamsters of LV-426.

B

Original title: Batman Returns
Negative title: Batman Doesn't Return

Description: Bruce has had enough, forget Gotham. The cat lady and the bird man run amok.

C

Original title: Clue
Negative title: No Clue

Description: a bunch of wealthy fools wander about a mansion while getting picked off, and nobody notices.

D

Original title: Dances With Wolves
Negative title: Dances Without Wolves

Description: AWOL civil war soldier apparently found dancing without wolves. Specifically no wolves.

E

Original title: Event Horizon
Negative title: Eventless Horizon

Description: the would-be spaceship of doom reaches safe distance to test its gravity drive, and nothing happens.

-_- Good grief everyone.

F

Original title: Fantastic Four
Negative title: Non-Fantastic Four

Description: four regular astronauts face off against overpowered supervillains and get extra crispy.

G

Original title: G.I. Joe: Retaliation
Negative title: G.I. Joe: Pre-emptive strike.

Description: eh, still just military propaganda, knowing half the battle, lasers, etc.

H

Let's switch things up, with titles generally rather than merely movie titles. As if anyone will bother to try this anyways. -_-

Original title: Hyperion
Negative title: Hypoion or something like that, swapping hyper- for hypo-, above to below.

Description: it's still Stargate meets Canterbury Tales, and twice as boring.

I

Original title: I Dream Of Jeanie
Negative title: I Don't Dream Of Jeanie

Description: the major jerk guy just plain doesn't.

J

Original title: Jurassic Park
Negative title: Non-Jurassic Park

Description: it's just a regular park, no dinosaurs. Muldoon destroyed them all.

Original title: Knowing
Negative title: Unknowing

Description: the mathematician with zany pattern recognition and his kid get put away in an asylum, everyone fries when the solar flare toasts Earth.