Train conversation

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So, recently I was on a train. I was sat by myself. On the opposite side there were two women sat down talking to the two guys who were sat in front of me. I heard one of the women say "Excuse me" and I wondered briefly who she was addressing. She continued "Are you gay?"

My immediate response was a feeling of dread within my stomach. She reminded me of some unpleasant people from my past. However, I didn't outwardly react. I didn't look in her direction. Rather, I awkwardly checked my phone and then looked out the window. Fortunately, it wasn't directed at me, I figured it was highly unlikely to be aimed at me since she wouldn't have any reason to ask me that out of blue. She was asking one of the guys sat in front. That made sense since they were previously in conversation.

He reacted negatively claiming that he was being insulted. I was sat there thinking oh boy, here we go. She replied saying it wasn't an insult and that being gay didn't have a particular look. That anyone could be gay and you wouldn't know. Why yes, in fact you're sat opposite a gay person and as far as I'm aware you are unaware of this information. However, I didn't get involved.

This response didn't convince him and he still took offense to being asked if he was gay. He made sarcastic remarks about having a boyfriend and then made comments such as "How is it not an insult? You asked if I was gay which is the same as asking me if I'm [derogatory term]". I was sat there being reminded of high school. The conversation was bizarre. I'm still left wondering what prompted her to ask him that question. From what I gathered, they didn't seem to know each other that well.

At one point, before asking him if he was gay, she asked him why he had said that he was seventeen to someone else, to which he responded "because I'm seventeen" and she told him that she had assumed he was thirty based on his appearance. I didn't see this guy, so I've no idea what he looked like, but a seventeen year old who somehow looks thirty is an odd description. He was making wild guesses about the age of the woman as well, going from thirty to sixteen. She was twenty one. The friend who was sat next to her was twenty.

... I'm still at a loss regarding what that was all about.

Thread title got my attention so I dropped in to see how it was that trains were involved.
Indeed, that was a curious conversation.

Asking such a personal question is very rude even between people that already know each other.

Generally the people who ask others if they're gay are often mingers themselves. They mistake the lack of flirting with them (because they're unattractive) as homosexuality.

Unless it was a discussion involving actual attractive women, both themselves or others then it was ^^^

People often say stupid or mean things to each other so do not take any notice of it.

If you are asked directly then ask for why they said that as this asking will let the other person define their motives before you answer.

Other peoples conversations are best let to them to talk. People often say things they don't mean or didn't realize would upset others around them. People talk. We all need hearts to forgive. Without forgiveness this world is a horrible ugly place. With forgiveness and love, this world opens up its beauty.

The people who said that have an inward beauty that is unseen or unheard unless one can forgive their surface talk and dig a bit deeper.

I have had a great many conversations with people on quieter trains. All sorts of people from the rich and famous to the no-bodies and the peoples hearts when they open up are like flowers... Some have been hurt and need a healing touch. Others have an inward beauty which is unseen... (Have you ever seen the insect called an earwig? Have you ever seen it open up its wings? The most beautiful wings I have ever seen on any insect anywhere! Yet those little things rarely ever open them up unless they feel safe to do so. As insects they look harsh and somewhat ugly to us humans. But look beyond and see their inner beauty! To do this one must spend time with them and get to know them. Idle words and surface talk are like an earwig who has not shown their wings!)

This is the reason I'm here.

I wonder if she liked the look of him for her 30 year old gay son or brother and wanted to set them up. That's the only thing I can think of.

Out of interest, what type of train was it? Did you get the number?

Not necessarily. It depends on context.



Whilst beauty is a somewhat subjective matter, I found both of them to be conventionally attractive. They were attractive in the way a reality TV star is attractive, perfectly polished and put together but lacking in style. Not my type but definitely not unattractive.



Well definitely not the former. The woman who asked him the question was twenty-one, it wouldn't make much sense for her to have a thirty year old son. Perhaps a thirty year old friend or brother. Still, if that was the case, why ask that question after finding out that he was seventeen? Maybe a younger brother?



I get the impression that she wasn't trying to be mean. His response was unpleasant, but nothing I haven't heard before.



Generally, if you avoid the question, such as asking why they are asking, people tend to assume that the answer is yes. However, if you say no too quickly, then it seems suspicious. You have to approach it casually. "Oh, you're asking me? Unexpected. Nah, personally I'm straight". Other solutions include pretending you don't speak English or can't hear them.

I am out of the closet, but I'm cautious if I don't know someone's motive. Especially if they're a stranger. Unless they have some sort of visual signifier such as a pride pin. Or they ask the question in coded language, then in which case they're likely a close ally or a part of the community.



That's rather poetic. I've never thought of earwigs in that way.



It was a fairly standard train. Personally I go by service name and the places it stops at rather than make a mental note of the number. I've never had much of mind for numbers I'm afraid. All I could tell you is that it had red seats that were a little worn out and most rows were two seats, but a couple were four seaters with a table in the middle.

Hmm, wonder if there is a free two-day internet course in identifying train types that we could talk Lost Dragon in to taking ...

Hehe..

Loco numbers are usually the ones at the front as DMU's and EMU's also have individual carriage numbers on the side. Is the front number one needs. Locos that pull coaches will have the side number as well the same as the front number.

The majority of standard gauge UK trains use the Tops code system for their number. For locomotives and DMU's EMU's etc., this number consists of five or six didgits. The first two or three will be the class of the loco, and then there will be a little gap and then a further three numbers which are the individual locomotives number from the class. Sometimes the first of these three numbers (After the first two or three numbers for the class) denotes a sub class of the normal class. For example, a class 37 where the loco number is 37 421 and the sub class is 4. Basically a sub class is an improvement or alteration which is different from the main class which the origional design of the class would have a sub class 0, and then the numbers would start with 001 and go up from there, and lets say they made 250 of them... The last would be number 250, and then beyond that some of the 250 could have a special modification where they need to be numbered into a sub class to show they are different, so the sub class would start at a number higher. They may miss out the 300's (But not always) to make a distinct gap to make them easy to identify for those who work them or work on them, and the staff in train control offices who allocate them to do specific work etc. An example is if a sub class has a special slow speed conteol for unloading merry-go-round hopper wagons, the sub class may identify this so that the individual locos equipped with this slow speed control device will be allocated to haul the wagons that need to be automatically offloaded at a slow steady speed.
Other subclasses maybe locos fitted with entirely new different engines or for some classes a sub class could have a lower body such as the class 08's that were cut doen so they would fit under low bridges on a certain line, and another line happened to need narrower locos so they made a narrow bodied version of a certain class of loco (I think it was a class 33 if I recall) where one of the sub classes showed that these locos had narrower bodies for working a certain railway line that had a narrow tunnel to get through.

TOPS stands for Total Operating Processing System which was an early computer system where the loco numbers (Along with any other rolling stock and the train service headcodes) all ran off this computer system which though around 15 to 20 years ago the computer system was brought forwards into use todays computer technology as the old computers were in use for many years (A good 40 years if not more) simply because they were so reliable and never let the railway down! The new computers adapt the old system and have improved upon it, but the basic idea is all based on the old numbering system. Prior to this all sorts of numbers were allocated and some were direct cast offs of the old "Big four" railway companies (The GWR locos kept their origional running numbers as the GWR were one of the few that started off the "Class" system with its numbers. The other companies were allocated new numbers though the Southern used to have a type of class system but they used a letter... Theirs was allocated new numbers). There was an attempt to number early diesels with the prefix D and electric locos with the prefix E... All that went when Tops came in as a new common sense system. Good thinking as it is still in use today!

It was the class 33, a subclass of 12? for the Hastings line

The cost of making the different bodywork jigs versus the income from sale if the locos may have been the final blow to send Birmingham Railway Carriage and Wagon co into bankruptcy.

My father once asked me if I was gay; I was pretty insulted.

Not because I had anything against homosexuality---but because I was having trouble finding date with women at that point in time.

Yes. The 33. Can't have been easy.

(humour)
Bing.
Due to engineering this thread has been diverted. The railway fraternity would like to apologise for the delay and incomprehension this may cause.

yeah, thanks Mountain Goat for DERAILING the discussion...