Trying something new

Post Reply New Topic

Late diagnosed (35). Currently reading Clem Bestow’s Late Bloomer and Gillian Drew’s Autism: a Guide for the Newly Diagnosed (might not have that exactly right.)
Both authors have ASD. It’s been a weird journey of self reflection, heartache, anger, and excitement all at the same time.

I’ve never met or befriended someone with ASD.
Decided about a year ago I was done with social relationships. Was strongly encouraged to try making a friend on the spectrum since my diagnosis.
Here I am, I suppose. I’m feeling very nervous.

Well, stick around here and you'll be drowning in friends with ASD.

Or at least acquaintances.

It looks like you’ve been on here for some time. What do you usually do on here?

Waste time. I spend a lot of time in PPR, but it tends to be where the most bickering (political and religious) occurs so I'm not sure if it'd be of interest.

There's a handful of social threads I check in with some users I know.

I'd like to reverse the question; besides friends/a friend, is there something you'd like to do in a social space with other people with ASD?

If you would like to make friends here, I would suggest that you edit your profile to include a signature line that mentions your interests/hobbies and perhaps also your job (if any) and/or career goal (if different from your current job). That way, you'll attract the attention of people with whom you have more in common than just autism.

I’ve learned a lot about how a strong sense of justice is a common among people with ASD, so I can see how that’s a thing. Could see myself raising some hell, but that’s for a day with more energy.

I think I’m mostly looking for permission to be myself, or figure out who that is. I was thinking last night about stimming and meltdowns, for example. I don’t consciously do either and I certain that I subconsciously suppress both. I’ve only recently started exploring some stimming behaviors (I like slime and similar fluid/movement objects, bouncing a leg, and a I like to rock to music. Tried a little hand flapping once just to see and it actually was kind of nice.) I’m also reflecting on times that I have melted down, but I don’t think I recognized it as such at the time. I suppose what I want to know more about is how to take care of myself and what exactly my needs really are. My mental health has been really rough over the last few years (queue autistic burnout -> adult diagnosis pipeline).

What led you to pursue a diagnosis and what differences, if any, has that made for you? Do you find that these social spaces are good or necessary for you?

Thanks! I’ve been trying to do so using my phone, but it doesn’t seem to like this hardware. Trying again on the computer later. What I have saved doesn’t seem to show up.

For the record: I’m a history professor. My research is in film and history and my most recent scholarship was published in Social Order and Authority in Disney and Pixar Films (2021). I am specifically
Interested in 20th century Chinese propaganda films. My goal for my next work is to do something with pin up girl posters from this period (they were EXTREMELY prolific and a highly profitable career for artists in pre- Communist China. I could go on, but I’ll hold off.)
Interests: I like learning languages, slime, Pokémon, organizing things, cozy gaming (as well as survival horror) , anime/manga, terrariums, and I’m looking into book binding as a hobby for the moment.

Would you, or anyone else, care to share theirs?

Welcome to WP! I hope you find the diversion you are seeking here.

I knew nothing about Autism before I was 64 (I was vaguely aware of Rain Man but had never seen it). With my ignorance on the topic I would've rejected any suggestion that I might be Autistic. ...then while I was 64 I was diagnosed as Autism Spectrum Disorder, Level 1 (Mild). The diagnosis was quite a surprise, but a pleasant surprise. It explained so much. And I was old enough that it was not a warning of problems ahead but rather insight into the problems past.

I do not frequent all of WP. There are a few topic areas that interest me that I follow and I seldom wander into the other areas.

Sometimes the conversations get a bit "active". Should a conversation bother you I recommend you just leave that conversation, not the whole Planet.

And welcome!

Welcome to WP, Zombeh4hire!

Setting up a signature line:
Click on "My Account" (at the top right of every page)
On the screen that appears, click on "Edit signature" on the left of the screen.

This will produce an edit box into which you can type what you want your signature to say (6 lines or fewer, please, including empty lines) or, you can include a link to a thread on WP or to a site off WP - see Mona Pereth's post for an example of that.
It's also possible to apply text attributes - bold, italic etc - using the icons above the text edit box.

Once it's as you'd like (you can see it with the "Preview" button), click on the "Submit" button to make your signature active.

If you get stuck, PM me. If necessary I can apply it for you - it's not easy trying this on a phone!

Indeed, no signature is showing.

See Cornflake's instructions, above.

I would add: Make sure you keep your signature short enough. The form indicates a 2150 character limit, and the forum rules specify a further limit: "Signatures should be no more than 6 lines long and may not contain any images or scripts of any kind."

A coworker asked if I was diagnosed, her husband worked with kids with ASD.

I had a traffic stop go really badly and that kinda forced my hand. I wasn't diagnosed by my acquittal, but that started the ball rolling.

I'm not sure if spaces like this are always good, but if you're a recluse there's probably always a benefit to being social, at least occasionally.

Since you asked about interests, history is a big one of mine. I'm also big into racing.

Thank you! I will play with this over the next week! I think I got the profile picture and more of the profile info added.

Gotcha! Thanks for the tips.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Thank you! What a cool experience.

I have a loved one who provides support and advice in a rather tough love fashion. He'd told me I was autistic all my life, just not in a particularly kind way. I resisted it purely out of spite.
Then I bumped into Marriage and Lasting Relationships with Asperger's Syndrome by Eva A. Mendes. (Honestly, the cover caught my eye.) I curiously flipped through it, and as I did, it was nearly a guide to every marital conflict my wife and I have struggled with over the last 17 years.
This has been one of the hardest parts of my diagnosis for me because I am now well aware of home emotionally abusive I was to my wife for so long- even if I didn't realize it or meant to be. It's been hard to come to terms with.
This is what got me to start digging in earnest. I knew that there was no coincidence that each of these problems were ones she had been pleading with me to see for so long.

Early in, I started feeling really empowered. But within days of my diagnosis, I started to struggle. I suppose its one thing to think you might be able to use the tools out there to make a difference, but its another to realize that some of these difficulties are just part of how my brain works, and that won't change.

Did anyone else go through a similar mourning phase?

Welcome!