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ocean
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30 Jul 2023, 5:23 am

have you ever had a psychotic episode?...what was it like for you?


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babybird
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30 Jul 2023, 5:48 am

Yeah and I'm beginning to think that I'm prone to psychotic events as I've had a few in my adult life.

The most recent one was in the last 5 years and related to ptsd.

It's hard to say what it was like because at the time that it was happening I didn't really realise the severity of it.

Looking back I was completely in need of psychiatric help even hospitalisation.

I was exhausted. Deluded. Violent. Angry. Confused. Depressed. I was having hallucinations as well. I didn't know what was real and what wasn't and I was struggling between recognising the past from the present. I was absolutely paranoid as well. I think the paranoia was the most exhausting thing to cope with but at the time I didn't know I was paranoid. It was like everything that was happening around me was magnified x1000.

I'm getting treatment now but that's for the first time in my life. I'm working towards this kind of thing never happening to me again but I dunno if that's even possible.


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ocean
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30 Jul 2023, 7:04 am

babybird wrote:
I was exhausted. Deluded. Violent. Angry. Confused. Depressed. I was having hallucinations as well. I didn't know what was real and what wasn't and I was struggling between recognising the past from the present. I was absolutely paranoid as well. I think the paranoia was the most exhausting thing to cope with but at the time I didn't know I was paranoid. It was like everything that was happening around me was magnified x1000.


i can relate 100% to this...it was like that for me too...its very traumatic

babybird wrote:
I'm getting treatment now but that's for the first time in my life. I'm working towards this kind of thing never happening to me again but I dunno if that's even possible.


i hope the treatment works :D ...may you never have to go through it again


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30 Jul 2023, 7:30 am

Well it's a bit scary. I'm hoping that in the future I'll be able to spot early warning signs.

I hope you don't have to go through it again too


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GeekyFreak
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30 Jul 2023, 1:53 pm

Yes. It feels like a constant battle between me and someone else taking over.



IsabellaLinton
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30 Jul 2023, 1:55 pm

No, I haven't.


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Deinonychus
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30 Jul 2023, 3:35 pm

Never.



KeepWaiting
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30 Jul 2023, 3:51 pm

I have. I’m taking medication now. In a strange way, it was fun. My mind was working at full capacity. But, I also became exhausted, paranoid, delusional, etc. That part was not fun.



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30 Jul 2023, 4:34 pm

KeepWaiting wrote:
In a strange way, it was fun. My mind was working at full capacity.


It's weird how nice it feels when you're actually about to boil over entirely.


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babybird
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31 Jul 2023, 1:46 am

GeekyFreak wrote:
Yes. It feels like a constant battle between me and someone else taking over.


Definitely


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babybird
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31 Jul 2023, 1:49 am

KeepWaiting wrote:
I have. I’m taking medication now. In a strange way, it was fun. My mind was working at full capacity. But, I also became exhausted, paranoid, delusional, etc. That part was not fun.


I remember the first couple of times it happened I actually missed it when I calmed down but after the last more recent time I definitely never want it to happen again.

It's not that I thought it was fun the first couple of times but it was like as though it was an alternative reality and my mind was playing. But it was still exhausting but I was a lot younger back then, in my 20s.


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ocean
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01 Aug 2023, 3:49 am

babybird wrote:
I hope you don't have to go through it again too


thank you :D


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