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Age: 67
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17 Aug 2023, 6:55 am

Cork woman Evaleen Whelton who only learned she was autistic aged 37, tells us how her life has changed since and why we shouldn't be so quick to only see the negative side

Quote:
The stereotype of autism that is presented to us in the media is usually that of a male figure, who is either a mathematical genius or a young boy who is non-verbal. While some autistic people may fit into this depiction, we must remember that autistic people are just as varied as neurotypical people – and these stereotypes often lead to autistic people missing out on identification and vital supports and therapies, and there is growing body of research that shows women have being under diagnosed for years.

“Incan’t even remember what life was like before,” she says. “I’ve changed so much since", she admits.

Evaleen, who lives outside Bandon in Co. Cork, is a speech and drama teacher by trade. She founded AUsome Training, an autistic-led and neurodiversity training company, which aims to combat the outdated stereotypes autistic people face.

She also organises the AUsome Autism Conference, which was Ireland’s first-ever all autistic conference.

The Cork woman says having a word like autism to describe her life is helpful to her.

Evaleen threw herself into research about autism and neurodivergency after she was assessed. “It became my special interest,” she says. “I am really interested in studying autism outside of a medical setting.”

And she admits that being autistic often involves a “lifetime of trauma” but compassion is what is missing for a lot of people. “Usually everything about autism is framed negatively,” she says. “We need to try and frame things more neutrally. This is how we are, and the stigma arises from how other people interpret us.”

According to Evaleen, some autistic people communicate very honestly and are very open, which can be seen as naive or weak by others. “We need to stop putting value judgments on the way people act or behave.”

Autistic people’s sensitivity is similarly seen in a negative way, but this can actually be really beneficial. Evaleen continues, “We are often reduced to not liking bright lights and loud noises. But this sensitivity applies to everything – we can be deep thinkers, we can be amazing with colours and be so creative, there are many amazing autistic artists out there.”

A sense of community is very important for autistic people, but Evaleen acknowledges we are all living in a more disconnected world. “We need to expose ourselves to different people. We need to meet people without judgement and with compassion instead.”

For those who are autistic, it can be very helpful to meet other neuro-divergent people and share experiences, to feel less alone.

“This sense of community is so important for healing. Autistic people often have trauma from the way we were misunderstood. All of this can explain why we behave in certain ways in our adult life. We can be very sensitive to criticism and rejection.”

She encourages neurotypical people to engage with autistic people more, and reminds us that we have more in common with each other than we think. “Autistic people face burnout [due to masking], but neurotypical people also face burnout. Neurotypical people also stim [repeat certain physical movements or vocalisations, such as flapping hands or pacing] ... These are human things.”

She cautions against “othering” autistic people. “We are autistic and proud, but we aren’t so different,” adds Evaleen. “It’s the medical model that has othered us.”


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Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity

“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman