Dyscalculia and Derealization

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I failed most math during school years and I don't understand how people invented complex math equations. I don't understand how complex technology was invented. I genuinely believe that nothing is real. I just don't understand, I am sorry!

I also failed math in multiple grades. I was sent back to Kindergarten from first grade because I was not understanding basic arithmetic, and was given remedial work during that second Kindergarten year. I failed math some years and was allowed to advance other subjects and repeat math levels. (Homeschooling perks.) 8th grade I failed entirely, math was impossible and I was burnt out on school in general.
Later on, age 20, I did come back to algebra introduction and was finally able to grasp it well enough to pass Algebra 1. I even found myself admiring the complex logic of it all.

I probably do have mild to moderate dyscalculia, but am not officially diagnosed. I work with money at my cashier job and am always and forever reading people's totals wrong. I am slower at counting than most people and cannot do most mental math unless it's very simple.

That makes sense. I am sorry that I said it, I genuinely believe that nothing is real, I feel like I lost my mind on how complex the world is

It is dizzying to think about how people can do all these seemingly miraculous things. I don't understand how people came up with maths.

Me too.

It's a lot of rules and memorization. It's not that much different from any other complex field of study.

I've personally found that it's mostly a matter of understanding how to read and write it, the rest comes from that. The fact that most k-12 teachers are crap at math doesn't help.

Believing nothing is real in a theoretical sense and feeling nothing is real, as in, having a sense that one is experiencing a virtual reality of some kind are two different things.

Although a person could both believe in the concept of a simulation of sorts and also feel it.

It's interesting.

I had an existential crisis in my elementary school doing homework. I spent about an hour very deeply troubled by the idea that 1+1 might actually equal something other than 2. I don't remember how I got over it.

I believe God is simultaneous all-power, all-knowing, and all-benevolent while also being basically inscrutable and impossible to prove or disprove. I'm okay with this.

A lot of advanced science is basically indistinguishable from magic to me. I don't try to understand it. I don't have to.

The stock market is what really gets me. I think it's gambling and shouldn't exist, but it's pretty much necessary to participate in it in some way for retirement purposes. I think anyone qualified to give me good advice about it is inherently untrustworthy; I have to cautiously take their advice anyway.

I guess a certain amount of cognitive dissonance is mandatory or you'll have a catastrophic mental meltdown.

I like the idea that nothing is real per se, even though it doesn't seem quite logically tenable. I'm reminded of the saying from Assassin's Creed "Nothing is true. Everything is permitted." There's also Godel's Incompleteness Theorem, which I'm only slightly familiar with, but suffice it to say, the premise is that there are true mathematical statements that can never be proved.

In my opinion, the key to doing well in math is to constantly strive to understand the deeper meaning behind the material, and not just blindly follow the algorithms they give you. Try to understand why. Also, it helps if you have a good teacher. A bad teacher can surely ruin any subject.

Math is just a language. "The alphabet by which God has written the Universe" as...someone like Einstien once said.

you're able to read and write English perfectly well... as anyone can see.

But when you try to learn another language you realize how complex any language is. And in a foreign language you have to memorize a lot of stuff that you take for granted in your own language. And at least math is somewhat more consistent than human languages which tend to have tons of exceptions. Foriegners will talk about 'mens, womens, and childrens (because those words violate the simple rule that you stick on an s to make them plural), or stumble over expressions. When upset the immigrant person in your workplace will confuse "get out of my face" with "get off of my case" and exclaim "get off of my face!".

Long term yes, short term, no. One of the issues with math is how far you have to go before it really starts to make sense.

I read the title not knowing what it is thinking "Isn't there an ointment for that?"

Sorry. Is out of my understanding too as I have not even heard of it.

It's okay.

That's one aspect, but math itself is a form of applied philosophy. It's mostly a language for the purpose of describing, modeling and generalizing.

I feel like I lost my mind of how complex the world is.