So I have recently realized that my worst issues (disorganization and dyspraxia) both are due to my issues with completing tasks in a sequence. I have just been reading Taking Charge of Adult ADHD, and I have no perception of time at all. Only of space. And I also learned about habit chains, where you think "if this, then this". Like, "if I walk past laundry, put it in designated laundry basket for type of laundry" (yes, I have 6 different laundry bins for different categories"
I scored <99th percentile on Processing Speed Index in the WAIS-IV as well, not sure if this is related. I also scored <99th on block design and VCI.
My thoughts are all organized in a spatial/geometric manner, I am able to do things like, read instantly without any knowledge of how, I can quickly understand abstract mathematical concepts (eg. differential geometry) and come up with proof/problem solving strategies, my mind does these things without any conscious input from myself. It's as though I only experience steps of a decision (these aren't really sequential tasks, kind of decision branches I suppose) displayed all at once, so that I don't know how to know what to do.
Interestingly, I only achieved skill in math after I began to color code my notes, I went from struggling with trig, to acing multivariable calculus in 1 year. I think because I could glance at the page, see the colors, and not have to sequence anything.
Yet, I have issues with:
- Doing motor tasks quickly and in the correct order, such as snowboarding. I can only focus on one thing I need to do at a time, and I can't naturally balance, I can't figure out what to do. I can't dance either, I don't know what I am supposed to do.
- I have forgotten how to ride a bike.
- I needed a professional to come and make an organizational system for me. I can't inherently come up with any order or structure for anything. Now I can follow the structure that she made me (she said it was one of the most detailed projects she ever had, I need a separate and discrete place for different types of items, or else I end up getting frustrated taking a second to figure out where to put things, and make a jumbled mess) She put in dividers into my drawers for every possible subtype of garment. Without, my drawers descend into chaos.
- Breaking tasks down into small parts. Everything in my mind is interconnected. So I don't know what to prioritize. I can complete things as a clump.
- Understanding stories and narratives.
- I recently got a job doing a simple quality control task, where I get interrupted to deal with customers, I can't remember what order I did the tasks in, or what I was doing before I got interrupted. Trying to learn the tasks in an order hasn't worked. I have to refer to a checklist each time.
Hopefully this makes sense
12 Jul 2024, 10:30 pm
