Being myself

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How am I supposed to be myself around a friend if I don't even know what "being myself" is. If I chat too much about my special interests, then I'll just come off as annoying. Yet I don't have a lot in my life besides my special interests. How do I find out about my true self?

You need do nothing; it comes with experience, and the realisation that you can't please everyone, so it's alright to please yourself.

Thank you so much for the advice. I really needed to hear it.

Autism is not something you can turn on and off just to keep others happy. It’s difficult because they say it’s not an issue when you explain about your autism or Asperger’s but then they get annoyed if you show symptoms or don’t agree with something or if you do something different to how they do it. As a result autistic people mask in order to fit in. However, it can be very exhausting pretending to be normal and you need to let the mask go and show your true self. So I would say just be yourself and if people won’t accept your true self then that’s their problem.

What is the basis of your friendship with the above-mentioned friend? How did you meet, and how did you become friends?

Are there any interests that you and your friend have in common? If so, I would suggest focusing on those interests.

For me, this sort of thing comes about through long exposure to others in social settings, for me in the workplace. It also pays to be a good listener, especially if you don't have anything to say that the other person might find remotely of interest, and the truth is much of our thoughts, interests and concerns do not need to be shared with others. By listening, you can determine what the other person finds to be of interest and elaborate upon that with insightful questions and observations. If, however, the other person does not talk about anything that interests you, then you move on to someone else.