Which is better? Meeting someone online or face to face?
I seem to feel as though I'm not always motivated to try out any other dating sites and having had experience of being on them, recieving little views, replies or messages from people, it sometimes makes me feel "what's the point?". I do find myself finding it better talking to people face to face. I have felt strange just saying "Hi there, how are you?" And getting no response and seem to have heard that some women find those things are "boring". It frustrates me because how am I supposed to introduce myself or start a conversation ?
funeralxempire
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c) all of the above
While each has advantages and disadvantages, that doesn't mean one is objectively better than the other.
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For me and at this point in my life, online is better because I’m so timid in-person. I like being able to talk to someone and get to know them before engaging with them offline. It’s a bit easier to meet people I have things in common with online, too.
But that’s just me. I don’t think there’s one right answer here.
Gentleman Argentum
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I would suggest avoiding the women that will likely get a ton of messages, the hot numbers that don't even bother writing a profile because they have attractive photos. Looks are superficial and that is what drives most males. Looks are important however, because they imply physical and reproductive health.
I would also suggest spear-fishing rather than casting a net with a ton of messages. In other words, find one woman that particularly appeals to you, not based upon her photo alone, but based upon what she has written in her profile as well. Reply to something that she has written. Reply with a cogent and meaningful response.
Also, avoid doom-scrolling. Based on your post history here, I get the impression you are rather desperate, and that is something that will work against you, ironically. Rather accept your status of being single and begin to view yourself as desirable and valuable, because if you do not view yourself that way, then others certainly will not.
What I suggest specifically is to only visit the dating sites once a week, for one to two hours. Spend no more than 15 minutes scrolling through profiles. The majority of your time should be spent in two areas. One, your own profile. Keep refining it, with better photos and revising the text. Look at your profile afresh every once in a while. The other area is in messages to women. You should parse your words carefully because you get only one shot with a stranger.
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My magical motto is Animus facit nobilem. I like to read fantasy and weird fiction. Just a few of my favorite online things: music, chess, and dungeon crawl stone soup.
I would suggest avoiding the women that will likely get a ton of messages, the hot numbers that don't even bother writing a profile because they have attractive photos. Looks are superficial and that is what drives most males. Looks are important however, because they imply physical and reproductive health.
I would also suggest spear-fishing rather than casting a net with a ton of messages. In other words, find one woman that particularly appeals to you, not based upon her photo alone, but based upon what she has written in her profile as well. Reply to something that she has written. Reply with a cogent and meaningful response.
Also, avoid doom-scrolling. Based on your post history here, I get the impression you are rather desperate, and that is something that will work against you, ironically. Rather accept your status of being single and begin to view yourself as desirable and valuable, because if you do not view yourself that way, then others certainly will not.
What I suggest specifically is to only visit the dating sites once a week, for one to two hours. Spend no more than 15 minutes scrolling through profiles. The majority of your time should be spent in two areas. One, your own profile. Keep refining it, with better photos and revising the text. Look at your profile afresh every once in a while. The other area is in messages to women. You should parse your words carefully because you get only one shot with a stranger.
The thing is because I'm doing other things, I get the thoughts in my head to try out a new dating site but I never get round to doing because I'm probably at work or am doing a hobby or out somewhere during my leisure time. I also seem to have lost interest in some way with social media like uploading photos even of myself and I do have photos but they are a few years old but I don't seem to be particularly very interested as I said in taking photos of myself. I do feel like the only one saying this and do feel by not doing what I've said it's "odd" because most people have social media and is actively using dating apps more than me whereas I'm not as active and then feel that is the reason why I see a lot of couples is because they met online even though I clearly don't and can't know how they met.
Mikurotoro92
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I would suggest avoiding the women that will likely get a ton of messages, the hot numbers that don't even bother writing a profile because they have attractive photos. Looks are superficial and that is what drives most males. Looks are important however, because they imply physical and reproductive health.
I would also suggest spear-fishing rather than casting a net with a ton of messages. In other words, find one woman that particularly appeals to you, not based upon her photo alone, but based upon what she has written in her profile as well. Reply to something that she has written. Reply with a cogent and meaningful response.
Also, avoid doom-scrolling. Based on your post history here, I get the impression you are rather desperate, and that is something that will work against you, ironically. Rather accept your status of being single and begin to view yourself as desirable and valuable, because if you do not view yourself that way, then others certainly will not.
What I suggest specifically is to only visit the dating sites once a week, for one to two hours. Spend no more than 15 minutes scrolling through profiles. The majority of your time should be spent in two areas. One, your own profile. Keep refining it, with better photos and revising the text. Look at your profile afresh every once in a while. The other area is in messages to women. You should parse your words carefully because you get only one shot with a stranger.
The thing is because I'm doing other things, I get the thoughts in my head to try out a new dating site but I never get round to doing because I'm probably at work or am doing a hobby or out somewhere during my leisure time. I also seem to have lost interest in some way with social media like uploading photos even of myself and I do have photos but they are a few years old but I don't seem to be particularly very interested as I said in taking photos of myself. I do feel like the only one saying this and do feel by not doing what I've said it's "odd" because most people have social media and is actively using dating apps more than me whereas I'm not as active and then feel that is the reason why I see a lot of couples is because they met online even though I clearly don't and can't know how they met.
You have to make finding a partner your top priority if you ever want to make progress and start seeing results @chris1989!! !
It's the only way to actually get anywhere!
Learned that the hard way...
CockneyRebel
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Meeting in person is better.
People can be anyone they want online. People can show photos of themselves which do not resemble their current appearance.
It's not hard to strike up a conversation with a stranger in person. A lot of people are shy in this way.
Online has too many weirdos.
While each has advantages and disadvantages, that doesn't mean one is objectively better than the other.
Yep, as long as you're meeting the person you met on date for a face to face in a reasonable period of time, I'm not sure that one is necessarily better than the other.
The issue with both is that people have a tendency to lie and shade the truth more than is really useful in order to protect their egos. And that's as true in person as it is online. Although, I do think that in person makes it a bit harder, but honestly, if we're posting here, there probably are additional challenges to meeting people in person.
Gentleman Argentum
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Meeting in person is better.
People can be anyone they want online. People can show photos of themselves which do not resemble their current appearance.
It's not hard to strike up a conversation with a stranger in person. A lot of people are shy in this way.
Online has too many weirdos.
I have found there is a lot of deception in the online profiles. Women post photos of themselves from 10 to 20 years ago or with dyed hair in order to look younger. Sometimes they are wearing big sunglasses to conceal their face. They also will modify the image with a computer to smooth out wrinkles and make themselves thinner.
The profiles themselves tend to be poorly written and short. That is why I do not spend much time on OKCupid. I will look at 1-2 profiles each time, then stop. There is just not much to go on, some carefully concocted photos, a little bit of verbiage, and a bunch of nonsense questions and answers.
I think the dating sites would be a lot better with each person posting a short video of two minutes tops introducing themselves. That would spare us all a lot of first dates. I personally do not want to get a date, no. I want to get a relationship. I don't want to date a bunch of strangers that remain strangers, that is not fun. I also think that people should go on video-dates first before meeting in person.
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My magical motto is Animus facit nobilem. I like to read fantasy and weird fiction. Just a few of my favorite online things: music, chess, and dungeon crawl stone soup.
Meeting in person is better.
People can be anyone they want online. People can show photos of themselves which do not resemble their current appearance.
It's not hard to strike up a conversation with a stranger in person. A lot of people are shy in this way.
Online has too many weirdos.
I have found there is a lot of deception in the online profiles. Women post photos of themselves from 10 to 20 years ago or with dyed hair in order to look younger. Sometimes they are wearing big sunglasses to conceal their face. They also will modify the image with a computer to smooth out wrinkles and make themselves thinner.
The profiles themselves tend to be poorly written and short. That is why I do not spend much time on OKCupid. I will look at 1-2 profiles each time, then stop. There is just not much to go on, some carefully concocted photos, a little bit of verbiage, and a bunch of nonsense questions and answers.
I think the dating sites would be a lot better with each person posting a short video of two minutes tops introducing themselves. That would spare us all a lot of first dates. I personally do not want to get a date, no. I want to get a relationship. I don't want to date a bunch of strangers that remain strangers, that is not fun. I also think that people should go on video-dates first before meeting in person.
Edited photos are the bane of dating sites. Smoothing filters are coming under more scrutiny from dating sites. Every now and again, I came accross profiles and every picture had been edited to remove 60ibs and wrinkles.
I don't understand how some people think heavily editing photos makes a good first impression. Not being able to recognise your date is a valid excuse to walk out on them as far as I'm concerned.
nick007
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Honestly I get skidding in person. My anxiety of a man's intention had me bolting away before they get a chance.
My best relationships started online. It wasn't dating apps. It was social media with a common interest that started to spurr into other conversations as we became familiar. Then we would meet in person. By then I'd already decides I like that person so I don't care about the exterior. I just want the person I was talking to.
Perhaps if you prefer face to face, engaging with someone who had obvious common interests is your best bet.
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