not knowing when you have friends?

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Has anybody ever felt like you don't have any friends when you technically do? I do that all the time... and I don't know why it happens...but it sucks...

I did this very thing today; here's how: a really nice girl stopped by my work area and she talked to me for about 10 minutes. it was so cool; however, I didn't think she was there to talk to me. I thought she was there to see someone else and was just wasting time. when I realized she was there to see me...I goofed....and spoke aloud my thoughts...but...here's teh bad thing, I said I was just talking to keep her occupied while she was waiting for someone. She left in a hurry. I really screwed up.

I'm such a dunce when it comes to people....yick.

I was thinking more along the lines of thoughts, but that's a good example, for someone who says what they think (no offense). As for me, I don't say anything about what's happening or what I'm thinking or anybody. In fact, nobody knows my true full story of trauma. But that doesn't matter, I think that stuff is better kept secret. But that's just what I do, and it's more of a habit than a choice. But that was a really good example.

A lot of people do technically have friends and don't really have friends.

Like feeling suspicious of people, as Cordelia described? I do that too, but I keep it all in my mind. It does suck, but when you meet a person who has no reason to hang around you other than to be your friend, then it feels good

that's an interesting problem; I hadn't tought about the "thoughts"....it's tough, when people expect a response and theirs something internal that stops the mouth from moving. It's more of a "shrug" the conversation off and move away type of thing? Am I close to what your trying to explain?

It takes a lot for me to consider anyone a friend.

Well, and my mom explained it to me a long time ago this way. she has maybe one or two friends, the others are acquitances. That helped me a great deal, because I don't look at people differently. I see them as all the same, and for a long time I was always seeing them as "not friends" and I distrusted everyone. That's such a hard way to live.

I read a book called "i'm okay, you're okay" and it made a lot of sense.

i have a few friends who would do anything they could for me if i was ever in trouble and who definately care about me.

i do however only feel about once every couple of months any kind of social satisfaction, where for instance i hang out or do an activity with someone and feel that we really 'get' what is going on beneath the surface in each other's lives. the rest of the time i feel tolerated and well, lonely!

Sometimes I feel like that because I don't have any friends that come round my house or that I do normal stuff with in the day. I find socialising whilst sober bloody terrifying.

So do I!

I've had this issue as well.

Tim

Nice Super Grover avatar!

Follow That Bird was the first movie I remember seeing at a movie theater.

Tim

The people I'm around I don't harbor much trust for... as in the area I'm in - College people.

And how!

In high school I did have one frenemy. College maybe 2 friend. Many enemies. For the past 17 years, not one friend. Been isolated. Haven't had a conversation with anyone in 17 years ( except a shrink which is not really a conversation because the shrink can't ignore you and leave like would happen in normal life).