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brentmccartney
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01 Nov 2007, 7:44 am

Hi folks, first post here, just thought I would get some opinions.

I am a swing dancer and have been doing it for two and a half years, am pretty decent at it, nothing amazing though but that's beside the point. For some reason I am very outgoing in the dance classes, often making people laugh a lot. One of the teachers even said that I really bring something extra to the classes.

That's just a bit of background.

In swing dancing, being a partner dance, there is a danger of the "Boob Swipe" when doing some of the moves. This is something that is unintentionally done, if you aren't careful sometimes the boob and the arm (not the hand) want to occupy the same space and this can't happen without the aforementioned "Boob Swipe" occurring. Most people just acknowledge it, laugh it off and accept it as par for the course. That's more background.

We were doing a move this last week in which the female teacher armed the girls against the "creepy" dancers, of which there are a few, against the boob swipe with anti boob swipe tactics. When it came time to practice it one of the girls I danced with (who has been in the same classes as me for about a year on and off) came along, she didn't know what we were doing and I told her that it was the anti boob swipe to which she responded "You can swipe my boobs anytime".

Here's where my aspergers kicks in and I haven't the faintest clue whether that was just the kind of unsubtle come on that I need for me to realise that a girl is interested or if it was just feeding into my whole thing of being the funny guy in class.

Suggestions? Opinions?



shopaholic
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01 Nov 2007, 7:59 am

Well, if I said that, it would mean I really fancied you...

But then, I'm not your average typical NT woman, am I?



brentmccartney
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01 Nov 2007, 8:01 am

See, that's where it gets all confusing for me :-) I am a joker in the class, so much so that people expect me to be funny. I don't mind cause the dance lessons are in my comfort zone (cause they are quite structured). So just not sure if she was being funny in return or not. I say shocking things sometimes, just for the amusement value :-)



KindaRetarded
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01 Nov 2007, 8:04 am

:lol:

I think she was just making a joke.



Kurt
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01 Nov 2007, 8:16 am

It's unknowns like this that make life difficult for us. Because it's tough for Aspies to decode another person's intentions or emotions, the only way for you to find out is to act on them. If the girl likes you already, the bait worked and you're doing exactly what she hoped you would. If she only meant it as a joke, then pursuing her makes you out to be a creep.

Roll the dice if you feel lucky. Just remember that if you aren't you'll still have to see her every time you go to class and you'll be a "creep".



sarahstilettos
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01 Nov 2007, 8:40 am

I would guess that this was a joke. Some female friends like to make jokes about the two of you being a lesbian couple - for instance I am " married" to a female friend on facebook and we sometimes sleep in the same bed. But I know now it doesn't mean anything.



MrMark
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01 Nov 2007, 8:55 am

:) It's hard to say. It could have been a joke. It could have been a come-on. If you hope it's the former then just treat it that way. If you hope it's the latter, maybe you should just ask her.

I just reviewed your post and I'm not clear. You're a guy? If so, I would take it as a come-on. I try to be optimistic about these things.


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Aspie1
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01 Nov 2007, 12:54 pm

brentmccartney wrote:
When it came time to practice it one of the girls I danced with (who has been in the same classes as me for about a year on and off) came along, she didn't know what we were doing and I told her that it was the anti boob swipe to which she responded "You can swipe my boobs anytime".

In this case, I'd smile, and say "good to know" in a flirty tone of voice. After the dance, I'd sit down somewhere with her, start talking, and try to get her phone number. It definitely sounded like a come-on, so there's some potential there. Even if it was supposed to be a joke, girls don't joke like that with guys they think are creepy. So at the minimum, she was letting you know she enjoys your company and/or your dancing.

If I swiped a woman's boobs purely by accident, I'd say "sorry about that" (same tone as when stepping on someone's foot), and continue on like nothing is wrong. Basically, act as though you bumped against any other part of her body. Accidents like this happen to beginner dancers, and people understand that.



brentmccartney
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01 Nov 2007, 7:02 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
If I swiped a woman's boobs purely by accident, I'd say "sorry about that" (same tone as when stepping on someone's foot), and continue on like nothing is wrong. Basically, act as though you bumped against any other part of her body. Accidents like this happen to beginner dancers, and people understand that.


Yeah, the accepted practice is to chuckle, acknowledge it and move on. Whatever you do, don't ignore it, that's where it gets creepy. That and really make an effort to not do it very often at all.