The Ultimate Novel

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Yours can be WAY more detailed about plot and characters, but for me, I'm already concerning myself with that, since I'm writing it already...so here I shall fantasize about all the things I probably can't get away with doing. XD

Mine:

This would be a dark fantasy novel. Of course it would have all the requirements of a great novel: iconic, interesting characters; entertaining, realistic, well-crafted dialogue; an original, complex, and most of all gripping plot; and of course, all those wonderful details at every turn to keep things believable and interesting. The book would never be cheesy and rarely cliché.

The writing style would be reminiscent of that of "The Shadow of the Wind." (Beautiful novel...I highly recommend it.)

A few chapters of the book that would be self-contained short stories that would at first seem separate from the rest of the narrative, but would eventually tie into it in unexpected, creative ways.

You know Brom’s illustrated novels, “The Plucker” and “The Devil’s Rose,” or even the Dinotopia books? This book would sort of be like those in that it’d have both lots of text, and lots and lots of pretty pictures. Even the pages that had nothing but text would have textured backgrounds. However, UNLIKE these books, it would not be shaped like a square--it would be about the size and shape of any other hardcover novel (a la Harry Potter).

These illustrations would be illustrated by Aleksi Briclot. For another example of his work, check out his illustrations for the upcoming Spawn: Architects of Fear comic by clicking HERE.. A few parts of the book would turn the book briefly into a full-blown graphic novel, mostly for action sequences that would be impossible to describe. The illustrations would have a VERY gothic fairy tale vibe, complete with a color palette that would be mostly limited to black, white, or red. (While my favorite artist is Linda Bergkvist, I don't think she has the range that this art would need.)

Though it would generally have a serious vibe, there would be brief moments of odd, quirky humor. (Think the “Metal Gear Solid” game series.)

There would be an extensive appendix of “special features,” which would include (among other things) extra drawings, deleted scenes, and a “typo reel” (which would contain hilarious self-parody--think the bloopers for Pixar films). It wouldn't have any actual typos though.

East Berlin...spies...early 1980s...Cold War...African revolutionaries...Swiss bank accounts...fill in the blanks yourself.

I have a story in my mind that I'm constantly adding to. It's technically just a neverending daydream that mixes together whatever I've seen or read lately, so if I ever did write it out I'd be called a plagiarist or an unoriginal hack. And alas, it'd be too mushy to qualify as fanfiction.

The current list of influences on my dumb story include:

-The 3 Mothers mythos of Dario Argento (and Thomas DeQuincy)

-The 7 Gates of Hell mythos of Lucio Fulci

-H.P. Lovecraft, of course (the most original character I've thought up is a human/migo hybrid that the main character creates with alchemy and tries to raise as a daughter)

-A written erotica site run by a girl who claims to be both a devoted Christian and incestually involved with her parents and half her extended family (when I'm REALLY bored I actually TRY to warp my mind)

-Michael Moorcock (whose stories also have fixations on incest)

-And various fighting/martial arts anime

I doubt this story could make sense to anyone who doesn't live inside my head, but I'm starting to think I should just write the whole thing out anyway just to get it the hell out of my head. A few weeks ago I actually started crying at work when an emotionally loaded scene came to me. My subconscious just literally conceptualizes it and mulls key moments over repeatedly during every spare moment in my mind-numbing job. If I were an avid RPGer or online gamer, I probably wouldn't have that part of my brain free to do this, but I'm so introverted that I've just been a constant daydreamer since I was 4, and over the years my daydreams just became more focused in an attempt to delude me into thinking I could make a living as a writer.

I'd try to tell a serious story, but with lots of comic relief (which all but a few characters in the story would find sick/horrifying/disturbing), the flow of which would probably be like the better anime/manga I've seen.

Because I think about it visually, I'm not really sure if it'd make for a better novel, comic, or show.

I've chosen not to go into greater detail because the weird attitude towards incest and an involved dark comedy bit about necrophilia could easily get this thread booted to the adult section.

And talking too much about any novel/production can become a substitute for actually producing it. This is a serious warning I learned in broadcasting school.

But if no one wants to heed it, it'd be neat to have a thread where all us aspiring writers could bounce ideas off each other!

Hah, so basically Lovecraft + Incess + Martial Arts. Dude, that could potentially have a huge fan base.