Assumptions you make about women based on dress sense

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alright guys. say you're in a pub or a club or at a gig. what kind of judgements do you make about a woman based on her choice out of dressy clothes, (ie. short skirts, heels) or more casual stuff, (trousers, flat shoes etc).

Assume that both are well maintained, ie. decent haircut, make up on, not smelling, etc.

Do you notice the more casually dressed woman at all?



I may as well admit this is a bit of paranoia on my part, I've decided to calm down my dress sense, (and drink less) so that I don't attract "The Wrong Type Of Man", but I went out twice and felt invisible.

For one thing, I never go to pubs, clubs or gigs. American culture is very different from British culture in that regard. When I lived abroad, I did go to such places, but not in the USA.

For another thing, if that is your portrait in your avatar, then you are very pretty, and I would certainly notice you.

High heels I think are silly -- I just wonder about the intelligence of women who are trying to torture and disfigure themselves.

Short skirts and other revealing clothing would certainly grab my attention.

However, if you overdid your appearance, then I would probably form an early conclusion that I was not the sort of bloke that would interest you.

Please forgive me if this comes across with aspie rudeness, because that's not my intention, I'm actually curious. But... are guys who target their love interest based on physical appearance alone, like in a club... ever "The Right Type of Man"? I know we have quite a few members who do this and I don't mean to offend them, but my impression of guys who have come up and hit on me just on seeing me (regardless of how I was dressed) has never been positive.

I should add that I've also stopped going to clubs that I feel are just about people getting rat arsed, and am going to either very band focussed clubs, or to gigs. I am more looking for someone I could get chatting to and it could turn into something, more than for someone to hit on me. Like, 'hi! can I have a light? what did you think of the support band", not chat up lines. (please not chat up lines). I don't thinks there's anything inately wrong in deciding you're going to try and start a conversation with someone based on how they look. I did it when I was more confident.

I don't think you come across rude at all.



thats kind of confirmed what I always expected, that anyone a bit shy would assume I would never go for them

In my honest opinion as a female, I think casual attire gives a casual atmosphere to others around them..if she is all dolled up, I see them as a high-maintenance, "all about me" persona..trying too hard to look better than others...casual attire gives themselves a relaxed appeal, easy to approach I would say from a male's perspective...

Overall, I notice clothes and other things a girl puts on her body than her actual physical appearance. She has a choice in what clothes she put on, her physical qualities... not so much.

Clothes are the first sign of creativity and expression and tells me what is just going on in their head.

So I really go for the more casually dressed girl. Especially when it comes to make up and accessories, but overall clothes too. Being over dressed or under dressed for the occasion is also cool, since it tells me she just wears what she likes... cares about looking good... but not about social conventions of what she should wear.

Honestly girls who dress up, in the way I'm thinking of... the 'club' way... I tend to just ignore. They are putting too much effort in trying to get the wrong type of attention, the type of attention I don't want to give out.

But I can't say, because I don't go to those places. And whenever I see someone dressed like that, it seems pretty out of place.

With all that said, the very first and most important thing to me... is a girl's smile. It has too be genuine and warm... and well there has to be something about it that indicates a silliness... that I think I convey in my smile.

First off, why am I in a pub or a club?

Personally, I'm more inclined towards trousers and flats than skirts and heels. I tend to think that people who put more effort into their external appearence tend to be more superficial. I don't know if it's true or not, that's just what I tend to think.

I'd notice the more casually dressed person more than the dressed up one, one look at the one dressed up to the nines and "Yep, another person trying to impress people" then seeing the more casual one and thinking "Hey, she might be interesting to have a chat with"

This thread is starting to make me feel annoyed that I have probably been perceived as superficial or interlectually lacking because of the way i used to dress. I have some very nice short dresses that I'll probably want to wear sometime and I don't like the thought that it would knock twenty odd points off my perceived IQ.

Smart trousers and brogues it is then, but I'll convince myself I'm doing it because the nice guys are intimidated by me in platforms, not cos they think I'm thick and a 'ho.

That's only among us, though. Non-autistic people obviously see things differently.

I wouldn't bet on it. Funnily enough, I reckon even the guys who go for the girl in the miniskirt probably agree she's intellectually lacking.

I'm sitting on my hands trying not to go off on a feminist rant!!

Well, go ahead. At least we're ready for it.

We should keep in mind that guys who prefer the skirt may be too scared to admit it in this thread for fear of seeming shallow.

who cares
I have no one to impress
life's too short to worry about what people you don't know think about you

I barely notice women around me, its just not a hge concern as I know I'll never get her so why bother looking

Hey, I said that I might prefer the miniskirt -- I just don't care for the heels.

But, it is winter now, and it would be silly of anyone to put on a miniskirt just for me at this time of the year.

Of course, if you want to, then go ahead. But my reaction more than likely would be: "doesn't she have enough sense to cover her legs in this kind of weather?"

I don't think any of us would make assumptions on iq from what someone is wearing, more that we would have a first sight impression of personality type (interesting vs. one of the crowd). Of course after a couple of seconds then we can notice behavior which could well throw the first sight impression out the window.