Ways to anger your psychologist

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Just wanted to start a new thread for funny ideas to screw with your psych's head during sessions. I know I'm bad, but I like messing with these people who think they know so much about us. I swear I think I will sit and rock the whole time at my session tomorrow just to bug her since she says I have such mild AS.

+Stay up for a week straight
+Rub your nose a lot
+Cut your arms
+Burn your fingers

Then come in

It'll be a hoot. Who knows what she'll say about you? Definitely think "drug addict" though.
Whoo-doggy

I should have not paid attention at all in my session with my psychiatrist; I should have paced back and forth and looked at the light and talked loud and fast like I was dying to. Then he might have given me Ritalin.

My husband was shrinking his shrink. It started out as the typical trick they use to make people relax, and ended with the therapist admitting that he only did this for the thrill of manipulating a persons mind. They never even talked about him at all! lol, the doctor made a point not to see him again....

Usually by being myself.

ex:

P: "Your problem is that you are not in-tune with your emotions. There is no connection."

M: "Yes, it is because I do not care. Well, I mean I try to, but I just don't know how. I mean, I would like to, or I thought I was. I...uhh...I...I don't know if I am caring or not."

P: "I don't understand."

M: "No one does. I'm trying to figure that out myself."

P:

This is, um...kind of...mean. You see, I'm a psychology major at my college and I'm pursuing Autism therapy. Now, I totally understand that the only way psychologists will understand you is if they've had AS or Autism themselves, but psychologists are there to help you.

Bring as huge rucksack of food with you and eat all thru the session.

Dye your skin green and say you want to come to terms with the disease you have that makes you ugly to people.

Wear blue lipstick, latex gloves, a Scottish kilt, a pocket watch around your neck on a thin piece of twine, an Army Surplus jacket, a tutu as a shirt, watches on your wrists and ankles and fingers, a pink silk sash with a pocket watch dangling from it, and no shoes. Say you're there for depression though, not an attention-craving disorder or AS-like stuff or OCD.

I have found most therapists to be useless because it is so absolutely easy to play with their minds, and then laugh while they confidently run in whichever direction you throw the ball. I spent a few years doing that.

But then I began to ask myself if that was really how I wanted to spend my money.

In the end, YOUR money is going straight into THEIR bank accounts - not the other way around; see how therapeutic that feels.

My therapist told me that I was the only patient she had that wanted to hear her talk more than they wanted to hear themselves talk. I was proud of that.

Simply disagree with them.

I have noticed that out of all three psychologists I have had, they all want to be right. If I disagree with something that they say, they start a debate

Show him your collection of fish (bring a sackful of off seafood).

So true, Brittany!

In the case of my therapist, all I need to do is ask her to give supporting evidence to her claims and diagnoses of me, and refuse to buy them if she doesn't support them, for her to go berserk and yell like a madwoman.

#1. be honest.
#2. point out all the illogical things they say
#3. (variation on #1 plus #2) repeat all the illogical things they say in the form of a question, and insist that you REALLY want to know the answer

The ultimate: Write A LOT (I'm not a speaker, as most of you know). So, give him homework. Pages and pages of homework. With pictures of nightmares, chemical formulas, etc. I think I've been ex-communicated from the APA...

I really do try and I want to do better. I do not know how. Given, this is a very bad time to ask me this question. My PsyD and I broke-up this afternoon. Sigh.

Yoshie777, I am sorry. I am not mean at all. I had one really great doctor, whom I miss so much. I would never, and do not, 'play games.' I think this is a mutual waste of time and effort. But I have a hard time trying to understand emotions and my ex-PsyD is NOT familiar with HFA. Incongruent mess. I really tried.

Tears, tears, tears....

Completely aside that I don't wish to anger anyone (I'm kind of a nice person and all); is it logical to anger a person who can completely fudge you up legally if he/she so wished, if he/she realized what you were doing and wasn't exactly a nice person either?

You're also paying this person to help you; if you get no help....

And also, you may just have "mild" AS compared to those she sees, those she has seen.