Misreading between the lines

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Do you think there is such a thing?


I think there is. You say something and people don't take it literal because they add in what you said. Here is one of them:


Last year, my boyfriend was making mac n cheese and then he cursed and I asked him what was wrong and he said he spilled some noodles in the sink and I said "At least it's less calories now." and he said thanks for calling him fat. WTF, I never said he was fat so I told him I didn't say he was and he said that's what I implied and I told him "I did not" and tried explaining to him it's less calories for him to have and he said that was implying he was fat. I told him he was reading between the lines and he said it's not reading between them, it's the meaning of the sentence. To me, still reading between the lines. A literal person would not get that wrong assumption and he/she would have believed me if they got a wrong assumption. What he did, he misread between the lines. There was nothing to read between them, I said what I exactly meant with no hidden meaning. (Rolling eyes for his stupidity)

Sounds like he was just hangry. Hangry being the irrational irritability that sometimes accompanies hunger. I get hangry all the time.

Miscommunication happens all the time, even between NTs.
The trick is to learn to recognize when its happened and recover... or not.

Your boyfriend must be NT

Explain to him that a lot of WP people often react to events with absolute cold logic, and there are no extra lines to get in between.

Your reaction to the event was pure computer logic: fewer pieces of macaroni, fewer calories=True

I mean, any of us can see that, really - he was the one adding the extra layers of meaning, and then climbing into the equation!

He was an aspie. A classic one but he happened to be very negative, judgmental, have strange beliefs, very prejudice towards gays and adult babies and very ignorant and narrow minded. I hate people like him. I wished he wasn't an aspie. i even wished he never searched my name or he wouldn't have found me on here and start reading about AS and finding out he has it too and then expecting everyone is like him or they aren't AS. But this would have happened anyway if he never searched me because he would have seen me going to this site and me talking about it and joking about it.

Maybe he's trying too hard to "read between the lines".

WOW, I remember I had that problem earlier. That is one reason I may only say 1/4 of what I would like to.

Maybe. but he should stop because he is always reading it wrong.

I stopped trying to read body language when I was 15 because I was reading it wrong and making me look like an idiot so I stopped. I was thinking people were going to hurt me physically because I was comparing their moves to movies and I was trying to read their faces but was also doing it wrong so I stopped. You can still try but just don't assume you're right. Always assume you could be wrong so never take any body language personal or assume you are right of what someone is thinking, etc.

I cut that out to because I think it stands well enough on its own. That's a rule I try to live by, or maybe I had it crammed down my throat by work (not through human interaction). That rule is hard to live with and maintain confidence, so I don't recommend it for everyone. On the other hand, many problems can only be resolved by acknowledging a mistake.

Jumping to conclusions is human--or at least neurotypical--but refusing to acknowledge error should be a disability in itself.
It runs in my family--that is, my father and maternal grandmother both have severe problems in that department--and I have no...idea...why...

Now that this topic has come up, though, I think my lifelong confidence problems stem from the fact that I am almost always wrong when I try to guess what other people expect of me, and even at times when I do not think I am guessing anything. I remember Mum gently chiding me for my reluctance to trust in my abilities and ideas, then having the tantrum of the century because I misinterpreted the directions of a favor she asked me to do...in the same day or hour...rinse and repeat for twenty years straight...*hides under a rock with a random soft, huggable object*

This happens to me ALL the time. And no one will ever listen when I try to explain.