Depressed Aspies

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I have had depression (or cyclothymia) for a while. I've been in therapy for just over a year. I just started The Pill to help with my moods as they occur with my cycle. I've started exercising recently to get in shape and help boost my moods.

Anyhow, I had a really bad spell this morning. My son woke me up with ridiculous requests. I was in the middle of bad dream (about my son). Sometimes if I don't get through my dreams, I stay in the mood of them. So, the dream was violent and hopeless. I didn't want to be in that mood for the rest of the day.
When I woke, I felt better but my husband was staying away from me and was angry. When I complained that I wanted to be comforted, he said I'm "always" like that. He said that I"m always depressed, I say everything is terrible. That I'm always sad.

It made me feel frightened. I don't feel sad "all the time". But he claims I always act that way. He made me feel that I'm some kind of bad patient.

This goes beyond the "my face doesn't match my mood", I think. Do people close to you believe you are chronically unhappy? Even if you have a lot of good times?

i suffer from depression too. unfortunatley it comes with my asperges.

[quote="] I just started The Pill to help with my moods as they occur with my cycle. [/quote]

Do you know that The Pill can actually cause feelings of depression? I have a family member who is an Obstetrician/Gynecologist and he is very cautious when he prescribes The Pill for his female patients.

Mine is definitely not "from my AS". It's something that has progressively gotten worse as my hormones have changed. I've read that it's controllable with hormone therapy and exercise so I"m trying it. I definitely don't want to go the psych med route.

Yes, I just started "Yaz" and I'm going to keep track of that. I was on The Pill a long time ago and it didn't seem to make me depressed then.

Oh my goodness, I totally know how you feel... I'm going through perimenopause myself and I've been very difficult to live with lately. It's good that they're able to put you on some kind of hormone therapy. They're still adjusting mine and it's been a nightmare.



My husband and I are going through the same thing - he's a lot older than me, so he's probably more patient with me than I give him credit for, but we've had some hideous fights about my mood swings. Avoiding me hasn't been the problem, though. He's put up with a LOT of my weirdness over the years and recently it's been my deep depression and lack of interest in 'other things' (if you know what I mean) that we've been arguing about. I keep trying to explain to him that until my progesterone/estrogen levels get straightened out, I'm going to be very hard to live with and the 'interest' just won't be there. He just nods and looks sad about it. It saddens me as well, but I don't know what else to tell him. Turning 40 really sucks, trust me.

There isn't chronic 'unhappiness,' only depression. A lot of people don't realize just how depressed they are or how they might 'look' depressed when they're not actually feeling that way. Your husband might just be so used to seeing you being depressed (at certain times of the day) that he's thinking you're that way all the time. The only thing I can suggest is to sit down and have a long talk about what you're going through. If he still won't listen, bring him with you to the doctor and let them explain what's going on with you. I had to do that with my husband, or else he would have filed for divorce by now. We still have our rough patches to go through, but it's not as bad as it was last year.

Last edited by Rainstorm5 on 24 Feb 2008, 7:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.

We've had those talks and yet he seems to think I'm always like that. He doesn't keep tabs when I"m smiling or getting along or having fun. I've talked to my therapist about it and she thinks I should ignore my husband's exaggerations. I just should accept that's the way he talks. But I think he really means it and is unhappy with me.

My sex drive the opposite. I'm always "ready" and yet I blow it all the time and husband isn't in the mood ever. He's like the stereotypical woman that has to be wooed and chased.

Chances are he might be depressed himself. That sometimes happens. The reason I say that is because a lot of times a depressed person will only look at the bad and forget about all the good. He might need to see somebody about it himself. Just a thought, as I don't really know your situation.

Yeah, well, I got in big trouble for suggesting he go back to therapy last week.

You got 'in trouble?' This irks me for some reason. My ex-husband did this to me, and that's why I eventually left him, after the relationship began really dragging me down. If you're constantly getting 'in trouble' with your husband, as much as I hate to say this, it's HIS problem, not yours. He's probably guilt-projecting (he feels bad about something he's done, so he takes it out on you).

"In trouble" meaning that the argument quickly turned into how I didn't have the right to say all that.

You have the right to say whatever you want in your marriage. The relationship is supposed to be fifty-fifty, which means you get to contribute YOUR say, too. He just doesn't want to hear what is probably the truth, that's all. Again, I can't really say, as I'm not there to see it like you are. I hope you work it out, though. Everyone deserves happiness.

I don't think I've ever been clinically depressed, but I've been on various SSRIs for a while. I take the one I'm taking now because it gives me a bit of energy. It's actually quite a bit like amphetamines on a molecular level, and I suppose you could say that it has the same effect (just a mild high, really).

I have Depression. It's less feeling unhappy then it is just feeling miserable and apathetic all the time.

I look upon it as not so much as depression but a feeling of just being bitter and twisted......Bitter against everyone else and twisted by the difficulties that we all know and have that no one else can understand.
Yes i understand and sometimes have depression but on a day to day basis its just a feeling of isolated and contained bitterness that will never go away....

Alex(uk)

For most of my life, my parents have thought that Depression was the crux of all of my mental issues....and while I do have depression from time to time..and it can impact my life somewhat signifigantly...it is not my only issue....or is it?

I have never been really treated for depression....but once when I went to a shrink who prescribed me prozac after a brief chit-chat...where it had been my plan to bring up all my attention and learning problems....instead he effortlessly chose to pidgeonhole me.

My mom attributes all of her mental issues to "depression" as well...

Maybe my depression is the reason I am so often lacking the energy to focus on things...it does not feel like "sadness" all the time persay....but it does sorta seem to muffle the ability to feel happy...