Someone who wasn't at all famous. XD If it was anyone I was a fan of I'd be uber-embaressed and that might mess up my performance a bit.
I actually have written up a whole big thing about what, in my mind, would be the most ultimate film ever. I wouldn't be the star of it, naturally...but here's the short version:
-Starring Eva Green (and various other people but I haven't decided exactly who. Possibly: Robert Downey Jr., Cillian Murphy, Crispin Glover, Clive Owen, Monica Bellucci, Bill Nighy, Ron Perlman, Andy Serkis, Hugo Weaving, etc.?)
-Dark, gothic look with everything being in black, white, or red; every shot being uber-pretty. Think Cradle of Filth's "Nymphetamine" video mixed with "Sleepy Hollow" and the painterly greenscreen'd approach to "300."
-Awesome opening titles and end credits (I have a fetish for those)...think the end credits to "Running Scared" or "A Series of Unfortunate Events" (the credits were better than the movie itself, I thought)
-Mind-blowing, complicated dark fantasy story with many different intertwining sub plots, and voice over narration. A story that builds and builds and builds....
-Comic book panel editing (think "Hulk") and chapter titles (think "Southland Tales" or "Babe")
-Monster effects by Chris Cunningham (that guy who did "Rubby Jonny," Aphex Twin's "Come to Daddy" video, Bjork's "All is Full of Love" video, etc.); monsters done in the grotesque, twisted style of the monsters of the "Silent Hill" games and film
-Incredible fight scenes and a long, half-hour end battle. The actions sequences would NOT have quick cutting--they would be a ballet of violence, not a struggle to keep up with what’s going on. Lots and lots of pretty shots. Fight scene choreography by Woo-Ping Yuen.
-A trippy animated chapter (a la Kill Bill Vol. 1’s anime sequence)--possibly directed by David Firth.
-Epic cinematography that always gives a clear view on what's going on (no shaky camera here!); lots of pretty shots and strange camera movements
-Scenes so sad they make you cry. Scenes so intense you're gripping your seat. Scenes so awesome your jaw drops. Etc.
-The soundtrack would mainly be by Danny Elfman, but there would also be several new songs by artists like Evanescence, Marilyn Manson, Rammstein, etc. with lyrics that would relate to the plotline.
-The DVD: You know the DVD cases for the first two “Harry Potter” movies, the 2-Disk version of “Fight Club,” or the “Lord of the Rings: Extended Edition” movies? It’d be like that. The design would keep up with the gothic asthetic, and the cover art would be very pretty indeed. Lots of special features, too, naturally.