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Greentea
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21 Apr 2008, 11:19 am

I've been accepted for jobs that focused on an excellent first impression (prestigious cosmetics sales counter, assistant to high level embassy diplomat, etc.) so I know it's not from the first moment. But I don't know how long afterwards people notice my weirdness.

What about you?


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21 Apr 2008, 11:28 am

well, I'm never really considered "normal" by any sense of the word :D but then who can be? Most people don't realize I am an Aspie until I mention it to them. But that can be attributed to the lack of knowledge about the syndrome. Most people I've talked to don't even know what Asperger Syndrome is, and they just put me down as intellectual and eccentric. There are a few cues (such as my aversion to eye contact, and difficulty to carry casual conversation) but they mostly go unnoticed. I think the main reason people don't catch on quickly is because most people don't know enough about Asperger's and Autism in general.



Fayed
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21 Apr 2008, 11:31 am

Depends on how social I am with them. I spent the whole summer at camp and me being weird never came up ( I sure people noticed though). Only at a respite a few weekends ago did it come up. It may have taken so long cause its a camp for kids with special needs, so the other staff are more open to eccentricities.

That being said, I've been trying to be more social at school and have already gotten "Your Wierd" comments from other students there. I'm social to the point where i try to start 2-way conversation, but usually it ends in a few seconds in awkward silence.



REM
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21 Apr 2008, 11:32 am

What is normal? I never really understood it.



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21 Apr 2008, 11:51 am

I don't think that "normal" can be defined. I think it would be arrogant of any of us to call ourselves the "norm" that others must conform to. I think that we're all different, and that there really is no standard that anyone must conform to, other than their own. If you think hard enough, everyone is a minority in some way.



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21 Apr 2008, 11:53 am

There is no such thing as "normal," sure there are NT's but no two NT's are alike and therefore there is no "normal." The same is true for aspie's and anyone else for that matter.


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DevonB
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21 Apr 2008, 11:56 am

Good question....

I can pass for a while, but inevitably, I mess up and someone notices I'm a little odd. I could never maintain my NT act for long. Little things would pop up and eventually I'd get labelled as eccentric, or odd, but usually harmless. The fact that every job I've ever had all the people eventually start referring to me as the encyclopedia and ask me all sorts of questions. If they don't know its...just ask Devon, she'll know...



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21 Apr 2008, 12:02 pm

I've always felt odd even trying to be normal so I really don't know. I do notice that the less nervous I am the less concerned others are. Plus, the more comfortable I am the less worried I am about it, if that makes any sense.


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21 Apr 2008, 12:08 pm

along that line, why is society so concerned with being "normal" in the eyes of it's peers? I have never been in a situation where I have been called "normal", but none of the people I spend time with can make that claim either. I think we're all odd in our own little way :D I think, perhaps ironically, that being on Wrong Planet is the most normal that I have ever felt. :)



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21 Apr 2008, 12:09 pm

I do quite well acting at interviews too. Its the day in and day out working with others that shows my differences.

The clues are my lack of knowledge about the latest fad diets and soap operas and not joining in with idle speculation about others - I have only ever met one real mind-reader in my life and she was a very well-known medium and even then, its not a perfect science.

Then there is the slipping off on my own at lunchtimes to the library - I mean god, you just have to get the space if you work with others ALL day.

Then there is the oblivion to my surroundings when I am working; people think I am ignoring them. I think they should work on their personal development and self-esteem if they feel slighted because I am doing what I am paid to do.

Grrr... what makes you think I was in the wrong job in the wrong setting :?



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21 Apr 2008, 12:11 pm

I never really answered the question, I can act somewhat "normal" for a while. But people still figure out that I am not like them. It could be because I only half-*** it.


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JWRed
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21 Apr 2008, 12:18 pm

REM wrote:
What is normal? I never really understood it.


Normal is not being offensive towards others, being social, and being able to form relationships in a way that makes a peron functional in our society.



REM
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21 Apr 2008, 12:26 pm

JWRed wrote:
REM wrote:
What is normal? I never really understood it.


Normal is not being offensive towards others, being social, and being able to form relationships in a way that makes a peron functional in our society.



Normal is not being offensive towards others? then everybody I know then is not "normal".



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21 Apr 2008, 12:28 pm

My weirdness is obvious from the get-go.



Greentea
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21 Apr 2008, 12:30 pm

The reason I have asked the question on this thread title is that I never met anyone who defined themselves as an aspie, so I keep wondering if I'm an aspie compared to the others on this website (I could care less about formal dx, I believe my peers' self dx much more). And lately I've been having doubts, because when someone posts a video of someone with AS in these forums, it's always people who speak different from the majority, like slurring, hand-movement is also not like the majority, etc. This isn't me. So I started wondering if I'm an aspie at all or I've been in the wrong place...feeling maybe a bit like an imposter!!

Of course "normal" is an arbitrary social construct, a ridiculous one, but I used the term for the sake of brevity. I'm not asking what YOU consider normal. I'm asking how long do you relate to people before they start thinking you're different from the majority.


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DeaconBlues
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21 Apr 2008, 12:31 pm

I can pass for normal until, oh, right around the first time I open my mouth and speak... :?

I'm used to it now, though. It's been ongoing for 44 years so far, after all - and my not being "normal" is one of the things my wife values about me. :)


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