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KimJ
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23 Apr 2008, 6:23 am

I've been not posting here as much. I"ve gotten obsessed with exercise in a response to dealing with long term depression. I had been in therapy for a 1 1/2 years and while that helped, I needed something else. I was really out of shape and while I did have cycles of "highs", it was mostly lows with severe PMS (too much info?) So, anyways I finally went on hormonal birth control and started exercising. I found myself not obsessing over autism, or this forum. My moods improved, lifestyle improved. However, I just found out that my husband is leaving. after 12 years together (11 married). I"m devastated and sick and feel like all that crap I talked about , "successful relationships and Aspies" is just a crock. He doesn't want counseling.
So, I might be here a lot or not at all. I might be asking about single parenting stuff. I just wanted to share this.



annie2
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23 Apr 2008, 6:34 am

Sorry to hear that - it must be pretty hard on you. I'm sure you'll have plenty of support here. Can't offer much advice, but just wanted to say that I feel for you.



KimJ
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23 Apr 2008, 6:58 am

thanks



asplanet
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23 Apr 2008, 7:11 am

KimJ wrote:
I've been not posting here as much. I"ve gotten obsessed with exercise in a response to dealing with long term depression. I had been in therapy for a 1 1/2 years and while that helped, I needed something else. I was really out of shape and while I did have cycles of "highs", it was mostly lows with severe PMS (too much info?) So, anyways I finally went on hormonal birth control and started exercising. I found myself not obsessing over autism, or this forum. My moods improved, lifestyle improved. However, I just found out that my husband is leaving. after 12 years together (11 married). I"m devastated and sick and feel like all that crap I talked about , "successful relationships and Aspies" is just a crock. He doesn't want counseling.
So, I might be here a lot or not at all. I might be asking about single parenting stuff. I just wanted to share this.


Sorry to hear your husband is leaving you, if its not for a good reason then maybe long term your better off... I have found exercise really also helps me through bad times, so focus on that or whatever helps, things will eventaully improve they always do.

Like you I have my mood swings and depression often blamed my PMS for, but as my doctor informed me, PMS is not the cause things just get worse at this time of the month. What really has helped me is to understand my symtpoms and that has enabled me to control my moods and make sense of the highs and lows, been told have bipolar traits but under control and I have never taken any drugs.

I also agree with the recent research which suggest current hormone abnormalities in women with AS and their mothers. My mother had a huge hormone imbalance, like myself and know other woman also on the autism spectrum with hormonal imbalances..


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23 Apr 2008, 8:56 am

((((((((((((((((((((( HUGS )))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I'm so sorry about your hubby.

I also haven't been posting as much in the past year, and oddly enough it was around that time I finally found an OCP that worked for me. I never thought about hormones having anything to do with my own 'obsessions'.

If you need to talk, we're never too far away.



rifler39
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23 Apr 2008, 10:41 am

I came home one day in 1972 and found the kids alone in the house. The good car was gone, half the furniture (including the kid's beds) was gone and the bank accounts stripped. She got the money, car and furniture. I got the bills and the kids. I got the better half of that deal.

After about 3 years, I found FirstInLine and she has put up with my strangness ever since. When you ask either one of us how long we've been married, we each will answer "Not long enough." :D

You can survive. You can cope. You can be happy. Perhaps I am the stereotypical optimist, but I believe that. It takes will and detirmination, but it can be. And, it is worth the effort.

Pops


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KimJ
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23 Apr 2008, 11:05 am

thanks all. I'm just reeling. I'm ashamed, sad, angry and hopeful all at the same time. I want to beg for him back and kick him in the arse. I want a cosmetic makeover and look like a slob. So many conflicting things at once.
I feel like the closer we got to solving our problems, making things right, then he's just giving up.



ster
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23 Apr 2008, 11:40 am

(((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))



KimJ
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23 Apr 2008, 12:10 pm

thanks so much. I'm never a {{huggy}} person but I really appreciate the support.



curtsdad
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23 Apr 2008, 12:54 pm

Words can't express my sorrow for you or fix it. I'm just really, really sad for you. Blessings!



BugsMom
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23 Apr 2008, 2:11 pm

I'm sorry, Kim. (((((HUGS))))) You are in my thoughts!



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23 Apr 2008, 3:44 pm

(((((((((((((((Kim&Pop))))))))))))))))))
I'm so sorry to hear your news. Your emotions must be all over the place right now.

I to have really really bad pms, what makes it worse is when other people comment on it, its not like I want it I hate feeling this way.
I am also a single mum, a very happy single mum :D . I just wanted to share the light at the end of the tunnel. In lots of ways it's been better to be single, no conflicting parenting issues. It's lonely sometimes, but as I recall, it can be just as lonely in a relationship. But it's a lonelyness that is easier to understand.

You have a lot of support here if you need to have a cry, rant or share your joy. This place has become a kind of family for me as I'm sure it has for lots of other people. We will all do our best to support you and pop as best we can. You can do this.

all the best Aurea



KimJ
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23 Apr 2008, 6:45 pm

thanks so much. I felt so proud of myself backing out of the autism special interest. My husband didn't like the constant talk. But I feel like I'm just plunging into a whole new issue.
We've been stuck in the mediocre position with the school for a while. Pop is going to the special ed room for breaks and naps. He wasn't getting his work done on time and they sent it home. Like 2 weeks worth of classwork on top of his homework with no explanation why he's not doing it and what they are doing for him. We sent it back.



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23 Apr 2008, 9:16 pm

Wishing you well Kim...you'll get through it, although I know it's rough right now.

The first year was the worst for me. But now I'll second what aurea said...there definately is a light at the end of the tunnel.


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Temma
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24 Apr 2008, 3:46 pm

Hi KimJ,

I just wanted to send you some (((((hugs)))).

Temma



KimJ
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24 Apr 2008, 4:55 pm

thanks, I'm better but still just sick over it.