Help!! Anxiety / AS making decisions even harder?

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This will sound terrible, but I think my AS / Anxiety makes making important life decisions difficult if not almost impossible.

I won't get into any issues, directly but here's a hypthetical example that symbolises what I'm getting at:

You're in the wrong class at school.
Most of the time, its average to ok, sometimes even great, but you know its the wrong class.
Every now and then its absolutely horrible, and you want to leave / change classes but you don't want to tell anyone about it being horrible, or that you're in the wrong class.
Partly because you are afraid, and partly because you can say you are in the wrong class and it is horrible sometimes, but then someone will take offence, accuse you, or state that you're not in the wrong class, its the right class, and they want you there.
Then you think, hey its not so bad, and you keep going to the class and overtime the people in the class begin to mean something to you.
Then you're at the point where you're afraid to bring it up again, you still know you're in the wrong class, but you're afraid of hurting anyone's feelings, or having a confrontation, and even if you have the confrontation you know they will change your mind, and you will forget about how bad it is, and just stay where you are. That you might actually enjoy the wrong class.
Until something horrible happens again.
The only solution appears to be to just run away, or not turn up to the class at all, and go to the right class where you will be happy, however leave all the people that meant something to you, and you disregard their feelings by just dissappearing without explanation.

Most NTs would call this person (or me) a coward, and ignorant to other's feelings, that if its that bad, say something. The truth will set you free.

But for me, I know I will always come back, and the anxiety always stops me from leaving, unless I have something else to move onto. Though that tends to bring up bigger issues down the track due to the repressed feelings.

At the moment i'm at a point where almost every morning I wake up with severe anxiety or a tenseness in my stomach. I'm not actually afraid, I can get out of bed and do stuff, but the only thing that takes away this anxiety or pressure is distractions or my special interests. This morning I worried that I might be driving myself towards a heart attack at 30 (i'm 25).
But still, I cannot compel myself to change the situation i'm in, I have before, but I still come back, and I still change my mind and think everything isn't that bad, and I deal with the anxiety and just pretend everything is ok.

Sometimes I think of killing myself, because I want to, but at the same time, I don't want to. I'm not depressed, I find enjoyment in things, and I know if i can just get to the "right class" i'll be happy, i think...Even now, I find enjoyment in things and I get happy, but then it gets terrible and it all just goes away...until I forget or get distracted or things change again and things are ok.

Does anyone else have this cycle they get themselves into, that their conditions make almost impossible to get out of, without completely bailing, dissappearing or such.