"Everyone does that."

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I was meaning to post this yesterday but never got around to it.

Yesterday morning I was online chatting to one of my online friends before work.

He asks me if I am an Obama supporter and I say 'yes' and he says so is he and tells me Hillary is making a fool out of herself. I ask him how so and he says she said she is staying in the race because Obama has a chance of being assassinated.
I told him "I thought I heard on the news one time she dropped out of the race."
He says she didn't drop out and I said the news must have been wrong then and he said they meant she doesn't have the chance to win.
I said "Maybe that's what they meant. I took it literal or I missed some of their words."
He said 'everyone does that' and I said "I do it more often."

Well, all people make mistakes like that every now and then. It's just that autistic people tend to do it a lot more than NTs.

a lot of people who don't want to think i'm autistic enjoy saying this about the symptoms i list.

it's annoying.

"That's because you're male."

Girls like to tell me that about a lot of my autisticness. But I haven't told anyone I'm autistic yet. Not because I'm ashamed but because noone's asked, and I don't want to make it sound like I'm using it as an excuse or something.

um, If I where you, I wouldent let that cat operate the web-camera alone...he seems a little to satisfied.

I always assume people are telling the truth so also have the same problem. I HATE it when people say something as a joke, especially if it's a lie. I never get it and then feel stupid when they tell me they were joking.

I get so so annoyed with people saying this to me.
You try and explain things and they say 'Oh yes well so do I' or 'Oh everyone that' 'Yeah me to'

Im clenching my fists just thinking about it, speaking to the Autistic specialist was the first time I was able to talk to someone without them doing that it was so wonderful.

People just don't listen.

I suspect it's an NT thing: saying things that are designed to supposedly put you at ease, but have no basis in reality.

Me too. It's so embarrassing. But the other option is to always NOT believe people, which doesn't work either. Fine, people can just think I'm naive. Whatever.

"Everyone does that." Maybe. But how about more often, more severely, and mostly can't help it?

Everyone DOES do that, but some do it more than others. NTs don't have a magic ability to automatically understand the whole context of every situation just by hearing a few snatches of it. Granted, they can 'fill themselves in' a lot better than we can, but everyone has embarrassing moments, more often than not caused by taking something the wrong way.

This topic has come up before but it never occured to me until now...

When I say..."I do such and such" and an NT says" so do I"...it feels different then when I say "I do this" and an aspie says "So do I"

Now this might seem trivial but think about it...why is it different ?

For me, the first situation ...I am percieveing an NT as invalidating or trivilizing something that is a real probem for me because it happens frequestly enough that it effects my life in a negative way. On the opposite side...when some one else with AS says it...I feel like I am "not alone", validified in some ways that I am not "crazy" for feeling that way or doing something that way because someone else with a shared neurology has the same issue.

Isn't that weird?

not really. i mean, if they really DID do all the things we do, to the degree and frequency we do them, they'd be aspie, too.
except they aren't.
people just don't like other people to be 'special' in any way, especially when it comes to the brain. people feel, "well, i can do things the way i want to. if you can't, you're not trying hard enough.' they seem to think we're trying to pull a fast one on them in order to get special treatment. 'invisible' differences are frequently treated like made-up ones.

every presidential candidate has to be guarded; that's why we have a Secret Service...

The Cherokee Curse (every president elected in a year ending with 0 has been assassinated, or nearly so) seems to be coming to an end (heck, it's been 160 years or so..

Besides...Gore is still alive... (sorry, don't know what made me say that...

We shouldn't take it so personal when they say that to us. They are maybe saying it to make us feel better, but it's still the truth because everyone does it.
But I think I can understand why it's frustrating for lot of us, they aren't understanding our problems, they don't know we have them more often than other people. How about you guys start telling them, "It happens to me more" "I do it more than others."



If someone told me about everyone not liking bad surprises like a tire blowing on the side of the road. I would say "yeah but do they get anxiety about it, have a breakdown, feel panic, act like it's the end of the world, instead of just remaining calm and taking one thing at a time and they can concentrate on something else like reading a book or playing their game boy or listening to music while they are waiting for help. But me when my plans get ruined or something unexpected bad happens, I have troubles moving on, focusing on something else and ignoring the problem for now like everyone else does. All day long I would feel uncomfortable, discomfort because my plans were ruined, while everyone else goes "Oh well s**t happens" and change plans, and not be real bothered about their plans were ruined but they might be disspointed but not be so upset they can't calm down, and all day long they are feeling uncomfrtable, anxious."
That's the different between us and normal people.

yeah. done that. but i've had people tell me i'm making it up, or that doctors are just dx'ing me for the sake of it because that's what doctors do, etc.
even more ridiculous is when i'm told i'm making up the hearing loss. complete with $4400 hearing aids (which are NOT covered by insurance, yay.). some of those lovelies will refuse to make any kind of accommodation for me, including speaking louder. i've been told by people that they 'don't' speak lousder. not because they can't. but because they won't.

people are Special.

i'm not saying everyone means it that way, but there are an awful lot of poeple out there who honestly think that i'm either making it up, or being strung along by a doc for the money, etc. if people already think you are weird, or dislike you (or both), they are even more likely to try to say that you are full of it.
they often also think that it's brought up for the sake of pity, special treatment, attention, excuse for being different, etc.

for these reasons, i stay away from talking about the AS diagnosis.