Singlism- Discrimination against the singles.

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I am sure that many of you have felt it ....

Here a good article that describes well this phenomena:
http://www.forbes.com/2007/08/21/talbot ... albot.html




Have you ever felt the Singlism? I did, many times and in many occasions .

American article but it's exactly the same in the UK. Our goverment just made some tax changes that will have a really bad impact on low paid workers such as myself. We were told to apply for 'working family tax credits' instead, har har har. Politicians always talk about wanting to make things better for families, as if single people are just a drain on society. It does make me quite angry.


(for other brits - I know they also raised how much tax free income we can have per year to make up for this - but it only covers about half of what I lost out by, and it also benefitted people who'd benefitted the first time round anyway )

Couples and families have a lot of tax advantages. And there are advantages in the jobs. But money is not my real problem with 'singlism'. I am happy that I can pay my share to society.

It is the attitude of people. One of the first things people ask is if you have a girlfriend or have another relationship; like I am defined by a relationship? For some people that is the case, but I would not choose for that.

Some people consider me defective for still not having a girl friend, like I am defective (well...) at least it feels that way. I really hate the pressure some people are putting on me about the subject.

I think my life is more complete than that of a lot of people. I have a nice job to use my talents, I do volunteer work with and for children (also autistic ones), I can provide for myself.

Well, I would like to have a girl friend, but the process of finding one is not easier when people are constantly asking and expressing their worries. It makes me a bit stubborn and despising some people for thinking that way.

I get tired of being treated like a loose cannon when in social situations. I've had incidents happen in the workplace, where co-workers would decide to play matchmaker without my consent. Once, a female co-worker casually mentioned a single guy she was acquainted with, whom she thought I might be interested in. I made some polite noises, and forgot about it. Next day, the guy was sitting in the break room, waiting for me. Another time, a casual friend at work, tried to match me up with an elderly patient's grandson. I felt horribly put on the spot! It was as if I were something that had to be adjusted, as if being single were some sort of abomination. It really bothered them that I seemed content.

I am just sick of people telling me I am gay.

I am single because of women not because of men.

I am finatially stable, work out 2-3 times a week, am in school almost full time, am not too bad on the eyes ...

But everytime the subject comes up I get people telling me one of three things all of which royally piss me off...

"There is someone for everyone" "You don't find it it finds you" (completely illogical)

"You are too perfect to not have a girlfriend, are you sure you're not gay?"
(Men asked out = 0 Women asked out = 100+)

and finally

"It's not you, it's them" (Uh, huh sure)

And another crappy thing is most women my age (20's) go after lame jockey guys or completely soft guys who would ask the robber for a receipt before raising an arm to stop him...

But then after they f**k around 100's of times and most likely have at least one failed marriage and more commonly at least one kid they (Women) decide to be smart and go find a "nice guy".

The truth is I am not raising some other guys kids. And I am so incredibly pissed with how women treat us as men. We give them a little rope (womens rights) and they begin to walk all over us...

My heart and soul do not deserve the amount of disrespect women give me.

-Zane

Funny article, but to the point I think. Its exactly what I think as well - if I'm going to raise a child or children I want their environment to actually work; if the world has gotten that weird and as human being we're wired so badly that our ability to actually be in relationships are built on unbreakable arbitraries reinforced three-ply with pride, it really makes you wonder if our whole culture doesn't need a major overhaul in this regard.

I guess unrequitied love on my part sort of insulates me from most of the"singleism" thus far... people don't try to match me up with other people when i say "my heart belongs to someone I can never have because i screwed up my chance with her when i was 14"..,

Granted, this is all gonna change by the time i'm 30, still single, and still unable to kill a teenage feeling that would itself be old enough to be a teenager...

There is quite a bit of pressure to find somebody. I just hope I'm not single for too long...

The bad part is every time I ask out a girl, I manage to do something wrong which I can never pinpoint, and have managed to accumulate a couple hundred rejections thus far. When I talk to people about my single status, they can't understand why I'm still single. This is the part that pisses me off. You say you don't know why I'm single, yet I ask you out, and then you say we're not compatible or some other BS. This just blows my mind.

I'm slowly growing to despise normal people. Anyone I associate with now isn't really considered 'normal'. I swear, society just pisses me off.

Great article.

I have experienced this kind of discrimination, still am officially. I try not exposing myself to things I don’t have time for, and the rest I try not to think about too much.

This is yet another reason why I wouldn't want someone like David Cameron in power. The Conservatives say they are not about messing with people’s lives, but that is exactly what they do in practice. This whole nonsense about the 'the sanctity' / 'the scared institution' / [insert vomit inducing contrived phase, etc] is enough to make you blood boil. They come up with a lot of false and irrelevant statistics about family breakdown based on many assumptions, when it could be that the nature of relationship breakdowns is that they don't necessarily have any advantages when married. On the contrary, usually it makes it more expensive and prolonged, more likely to cause additional conflict. My friend is in that situation at the moment, it sucks for both of them. And they are not even allowed to get divorced yet, or they might have to hire a lawyer just to find out. Another assumptions David’s cronies make is that unmarried or married people will always want to have children. Instead of blaming immigrants for the population serge, why not reward people for not having children, or at least level the playing field? Marriage has always had legal benefits, but there is no indication that further benefits will stop family breakdown, it hasn’t done already. It is often presumptuous to want to stop marriage breakdown in the first place. I bet many here know of an example where the reluctance to break one up has caused further trauma/abuse to the spouse or children. It also implies that these break-ups wouldn’t happen if people believed marriage to be some sort of inflatable entity. Yet another assumption is that you can't have a stable family unit without marriage. According to David Cameron my cousin and his partner and kids don't exist, or that that they are all crack addicted scum.