I dont know what to do.

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I'm trying to stay happy but I just cant do it.
I try and tell myself it is all about to get better.
But the truth is I dont think it will.

I think my life will only get worse with time. I have a home to live in . A bad home but still a home. One day I'll be homeless on the street. I cant work I dont think I ever will be able to.

I really cant sleep anymore. I want it to get better.

Will it ever get better, tell me please. Will this get better.

I havent had much happyness in my life . I have only been happy twice in my life. Both times where when I was with my boyfriend.

I want to be with him I miss him.

I dont leave my room much, I cant because I'm scared of my dad.

I want things to get better.

I have tried to be a good person. What does god want form me!

Sometimes I look up at the sky and ask god why my life wont get better. I went crazy once cause I went over the edge with stress.

I keep telling myself life gets better, I'm 21 not when will I be happy? When will I not live in fear. When?

I have a question, Why are you scared of your dad?? You can pm me if you don't want everyone to know. Just know that I am here for you if you need someone to talk to!

Gosh, I have days like this myself. I often wonder when I will be happy or when my life will get better or if it ever will.

I'm not just saying this to make you feel better, but over time, things will get better. I'm finding out that God will only do so much for us, all the rest we have to do ourselves. But I know that isn't always easy either.

In my case, I really can't work either because of my social skills. But I'm going to take a social skills class to work on them. Maybe there is one where you live. Then you can get a job and move out eventually. But if not, is there anyone else you can stay with?

I hope that helps at least a little. You're still so young, a lot of good things can still happen. Maybe some day you'll see your boyfriend again and you'll get to stay with him.