"You Don't Look Autistic"

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Since I've received my diagnosis, I've told a few people that I have Aspergers and their first words after my revelation, is that I don't "look" autistic. I guess if you put me in a room with others along the spectrum, I don't look like it, but people who really know me, know that I do certain things that show that I have Aspergers.

It kind of bugs me a bit.

Has anyone else had this experience?

Take it as a compliment.

The people that provided me with a means to a diagnosis say very much that same sort of thing. But it doesnt mean they dont believe it.

Their beliefs do not define you.

Its not like we have Aspergers tattooed on our foreheads, aspies look like everyone else, maybe if your a low functioning autistic, would people know.

I have Asperger's in my eyes, my walk and the way I stare. I also have it in my lecture.

Hmmm.... One of the reasons that I began to suspect that I might have Aspergers was that ABC news ran a report on a program in a junior high school where NT kids were mentoring Aspie kids. Everybody in that report acted like the Aspie kids were visibly/obviously different. I couldn't see any difference. Maybe there's something about us that NTs can see and we can't?

When I was diagnosed, and I finally told my mother, she seemed taken aback but not freaked out. Then later she said. "Well, I guess if you WANT to have Assburgers, you can." yeah she said ASS BURGERS then laughed.
People, especially babyboomers, tend to have preconceived notions on what someone should look like with "disabilities". I write it off by knowing that everyone is different and everyone on the spectrum will interact with their abilities differently. The is no Model autistic, hence there is a spectrum.

I was talking to someone the other night about autism (they don't know about me), and they were mentally mixing up autism and Down's Syndrome. Maybe this is common.

it could be that the things we do make us appear different when if we don't do those things we appear 'normal'.

if i sit and don't move or say anything - what i did most of my childhood - i pass as 'normal'.
if i be myself - as i learned was ok in my teen/adult years - i am seen as different.

and as for physical aspects: facial characteristics, body posture, clothing style... i don't think any one person could categorize autistics based on these things.

My guess is people who are saying that, don't know what an autistic person looks like. And even some professionals don't know that.

I've gotten, "You seem normal to me."


It's never bugged me before. Why should it? At least they see me as normal instead of something else like other kids did when I was little.

Only my family knows about my AS and one good friend. They all say I look completely normal and I don't "act" like I have anything wrong. I blame that on being taught growing up to not be different. Like I said in one post my Dad was always telling me to get my head up because I always looked at the ground. However, since my DX my Mom and Dad admit they know I'm different but to actually accept it's because of some kind autism, they just can't do it, it's too much for them. But I do have people asking me a lot "What's wrong? You look sad." or "Eww, aren't we mad?" and "What's bugging you?"
None of these questions fit my mood when asked. I guess I look normal but always mad, sad or bugged, not different. It's kind of annoying.

People with Autism/Asperger's look "normal" in physical appearance.

It shows when one interacts, but if your level of impairment in nonverbal and verbal communication is perhaps in the "mild", it'll be invisible to "normal" people, other than appearing odd and eccentric to some of them.

This happens to me all the time. Usually they stop saying it once I start stimming, or if I have a meltdown or something. But otherwise be happy society sees you as sort of NT because it means your life will be a lot easier.

All the time. I am so tempted to ask them extactly what an autistic person looks like. Come home with me and wait for me to have a meltdown, then tell me how normal I look you ignorant freak!

This is an amazingly stupid thing that people say when they don't know what else to say or how to react. I get it all the time. Of course, I work at an adult service provider and I give lots of presentations on Asperger's, Autism, and Disability Awareness. These almost always disclose my AS. It's easier now then it was a few years ago. People always come up to me after these presentations and tell me that I don't look autistic. WTF? I know that they can see the invisible weird tattoo, what do they think that is? Duh.

I just say, it's yet another way that I promote autism awareness. Oh, and the t-shirts. Just take it as a complement and remind people that autism is a spectrum. It is not prejudiced or biased. Every culture, creed, and colour has autistic kids.