When did you start to know you were different?

Post Reply New Topic

Why? How could you tell?

When people starting reminding me that I'm purposefully nefarious.

I think when I was 5! I was not good with catch, found the hard easy, and some of the easy harder. Playing, and socially, I was just DIFFERENT. My school noticed when I was 6.

Probably in kindergarten. We had a little "dance" thing, everyone was having a ball, it felt as if I couldn't step in, remember hanging out in the doorway. Foggy memory, but man it really hit me then.

I think, most of the time I was pretty oblivious. In 4th grade they switched my teacher on me, put me in a new class. Then I was given 2 other classes to go to. I'm not even sure what that was about. I mean, there was "special ed" and stuff, I'm not sure if I was in that tho! Crazy as it sounds, I just went with the flow. I know in math class I had a TON of freedom. Went to the library for that class, remember laying on the floor doing work. Remember asking about division, why the numbers were divided so evenly. Was funny, as the example I was given just did not make sense to me, cannot even remember how it worked out, but I can divide today! Must have worked out, lol.

Also, eating so slowly in first grade. It was policy that in order to leave the cafeteria, one would have to eat all their food. I simply couldn't do this! And I wouldn't leave either! I can't remember how I escaped that place!

By the time I was 4. My speech was barely in at that time but my mother remembers me walking around, even back then saying "I am different".. so sad.

People just glared at me when I talked to them.

I think I've always known I was different for as long as I can remember. I never specifically thought there was really something about me, I just noticed I wasn't like everyone else. My mom noticed probably before I was able to notice (or remember it). I just saw myself like everyone else, just different. As I got older and more aware of myself and others (and after being diagnosed between fifth and sixth grade), I REALLY started to notice what was so different about me and even started to understand why people thought I was weird and avoided and/or made fun of me. Thing is, I'm still picked on, and I COULD act differently and more like an NT but I don't want to have to reprogram my whole self just to fit in. I have some really great friends who genuinely love the real Aspie me and love me the way I am. So changing myself wouldn't really be a good thing. Besides, why can't THEY change THEMSELVES to be more accepting to differences? Why must I be the one to change just to fit in the NT dominated world? Sorry for going on ranting. -Power Girl

I think the first time was when I was about 6 or 7. I went to a playground with my mom, there were a bunch of other kids there with their parents. I tried to play along with all of them, and they seemed to want nothing to do with me. There was however, this one girl who went on the seesaw with me, and when she went to the bottom, she stayed down there and left me up just to get me upset. A little while later some of the kids and parents were talking to each other saying how I was different (not in a good way). Later I asked my mom why I was different from them, and she said that they just didn't "understand" me. Now I can see why they would think that, but at the time I was just very confused by it.

For me, there is no specific event, at least none that I can remember at the moment. It's just that after EVERY summer camp, school, or after-school program I joined left me isolated and/or tormented, something's got to be up.
I may not even have an ASD, but no matter what I know that I'm most certainly not one of the norm.

^^^I'm in the same boat there.

I cannot remember a moment I did not know. I knew because all the kids made sure I did not fit in.

My own father treated me like I was bad and wrong from the first I can remember. Actually felt pretty normal (same as home, that is) at school. Everybody hated me. Always have.

Knowing what I know now, it must be over some pretty mindless crap. Did I not look at you with "respect"? Did I not answer your question right? Did I use the wrong word?

Always different. Always bad. Always thought people ought to like me because I was trying to be really, really nice. They never did.