Love hasn't even bothered entering my door.

Page 1 of 1 [ 9 posts ] 

Kaufmancab51
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 2 Sep 2008
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 180
Location: Rochester, New York

17 Oct 2008, 8:47 pm

:cry: I have seen many, MANY, people succeed in obtaining a relationship @my school. I don't see any 15-16 yr old aspie women in the halls, lunch, or classes, so that narrows it down. Let alone, i can't talk to anyone that i don't know, it's just nervewreking cause i can't think that fast off the top of my head. It's too much pressure on me, and i can't catch a break! It seems as if everyone else is succeeding, while i keep failing at EVERYTHING but academics. :cry:

What am i doing wrong?



BPalmer
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Jul 2008
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 516
Location: ISO 3166-1 Code AU

17 Oct 2008, 8:57 pm

My advice is to concentrate on the academic side of things. Study towards a well-paying career, or no female will want you. Do not make the mistakes I made, and end up a bum with no future.



theotherle
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 24 Aug 2008
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 45

17 Oct 2008, 9:44 pm

I'm going to agree with the advice that you should put your efforts into your education. I'm a girl, but if I could go back, I'd forget about dating and only pay attention to school. Frankly, the people I met back then (4 years ago) have made no difference to my life today. I met the guy I'm going to spend my life with last year - only now I wish I was in a better place as far as a career goes.



Cyberman
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Apr 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,736
Location: hibernating

17 Oct 2008, 10:06 pm

I know how you feel, Kaufmancab51. But if it's any consolation, most of the "relationships" that your classmates are in probably won't last very long... nor are they "meaningful."



AutisticMalcontent
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 29 May 2008
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 459

18 Oct 2008, 2:26 am

Kaufmancab51 wrote:
:cry: I have seen many, MANY, people succeed in obtaining a relationship @my school. I don't see any 15-16 yr old aspie women in the halls, lunch, or classes, so that narrows it down. Let alone, i can't talk to anyone that i don't know, it's just nervewreking cause i can't think that fast off the top of my head. It's too much pressure on me, and i can't catch a break! It seems as if everyone else is succeeding, while i keep failing at EVERYTHING but academics. :cry:

What am i doing wrong?


You're doing nothing wrong, keep studying and learning. Make sure you have a good education and marketable skills, that is essential. As for these 15-16 girls and guys, let them enjoy their naive slendor while they can, because I can assure you of this, it will more than likely die out in due time. I graduated high school, and afterwards, I saw what became of some of my classmates who were couples. A lot of them had broken up, yet some of them had premaritial sex and had to take care of their children because of their, how should I put this, lack of discretion. Don't think me a bastard for saying this, every child born on this planet is innocent and beautiful at birth. It is only through their lifetime that their true behavior manifests itself. I'm just saying the parents were messing around and didn't anticipate the possible consequence of their actions.

I must sympathize with you though, I PERFECTLY understand what it is like to be in middle/high school being alone and single when so many around you are not. But like I said, don't be discouraged, many of these seemingly important relationships guys and girls have will be blown apart sooner or later. You just need to find a girl you share common interests with, be her friend first and foremost, and then when you guys have become more intimate (not physically mind you, but mentally), ask her out. And stay away from preppy or ghetto chicks, they are nothing but trouble! Good luck.



Kaufmancab51
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 2 Sep 2008
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 180
Location: Rochester, New York

18 Oct 2008, 9:05 am

Relationships @ school last forever now. It may be 2-5 years before a break. The girls that i DO hang out, which are only a few, are part of the only "nerd" table. Everyone else is either preppy or a homie. :wall:

The way lunch is set is homies in front, near the lunch line, preps in the back near the exit, and nerds have to fend for themselves [usually in the middle].

I didn't commit any crimes, im just really shy.



LePetitPrince
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Mar 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,464

18 Oct 2008, 9:31 am

Quote:
I didn't commit any crimes, im just really shy.


Oh but it is a crime in the psychiatric sense, like the hyperactive kids who are been labeled as ADHDs and the introvert/loner personality are now being labeled "Aspies' , and all this labeling storm is supported by biased scientific studies (ie. control group vs ADHD group already on stimulants) .
Just few years later , a new disorder will arise in the new DSM and it will be called "Shyness disorder" or "LePetitPrince' Syndrome" or any first name of an idiot psychiatric.



LeeAnderson
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Oct 2008
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 936
Location: Cookeville, Tennessee

18 Oct 2008, 9:59 am

Kaufmancab51 wrote:
:cry: I have seen many, MANY, people succeed in obtaining a relationship @my school. I don't see any 15-16 yr old aspie women in the halls, lunch, or classes, so that narrows it down. Let alone, i can't talk to anyone that i don't know, it's just nervewreking cause i can't think that fast off the top of my head. It's too much pressure on me, and i can't catch a break! It seems as if everyone else is succeeding, while i keep failing at EVERYTHING but academics. :cry:

What am i doing wrong?


It's alright, man. You'll get it. Just give yourself some time and just chill about it. I know exactly how you're feeling.



sunshower
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Aug 2006
Age: 124
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,985

18 Oct 2008, 2:33 pm

It's ok, I know it can be hard to watch others in relationships, but although it may seem like it you're not alone. I used to think I was really behind the 8 ball when I was 18 and had never even kissed a guy, but now I realize I wasn't that unusual at all. Some of the most outgoing people I know (NT's I'm talking) only had their first kiss at age 18/19. I had my first kiss and relationship at age 19 :), and now I realize that's quite young (for an aspie). :D


_________________
Into the dark...