I don't know for sure, but this may be the turning point...

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So I was sitting in the student lounge today working on a final project and then I saw this woman I didn't know and she smiled at me. I ran through stuff people have been telling me about what to do when that happens so I gave an attempt to smile back. It must have worked because she was fairly receptive to me. Nothing came out of it (I didn't even get a number or anything), but now I think I am actually beginning to be able to pick up all that body language involved...

*HUGE CHEER*

That's great. Remind yourself that it isn't a straight-line progression, but I'm really glad to see your optimism.


M.

That is the attitude to take, ToS. A lot of people take the wrong attitude to something, some people on this forum will ask someone out, be shot down and see this as a failure, when it isn't. You've made a step forward, well done.

when i was at uni, it felt more like a dating club than an educational institution. women throw themselves at guys there (in arts faculties anyway) because of the numbers. you should be able to catch one at some stage. have you joined any campus social clubs, even campus christians or something?

From experience, i can tell you that the more you do it, the easier it gets.

1) the male:female ratio is 4:1

2) I commute to school, and thus don't see many people on campus that much...

..the same way you get to Carnegie Hall; practice practice practice.

i went to a uni (UNC-G) that was 4:1 female to male. Never got to first base with any of them. Wound up with Wife #1, who went to NCSU, which was 4:1 male to female. Go figure...

That's really awesome. These things don't happen overnight; it's all about the small steps.

That's a sad ratio but excellent news. You're going to go far, man!

good job! so when you say she seemed receptive, do you mean you went up and talked to her?

Yeah I did. She was studying for an exam and I was talking to her about that. When I told her I was an IT student we ended up joking about if I wanted to dress up as a girl to take a CS exam for her...

cool. my problem is that either girls don't really pay attention to me or i don't notice when they are. if i were to see a girl smiling at me i wouldn't have any problem smiling back and going up to talk to them, but most of the time i talk to a girl, i'm going in blind with no idea if they're interested or not. it's turned out ok sometimes, but it's a lot more nerve wracking when you're going in based on nothing.

At my uni, females were much more than males but the vast majority of them were taken already, again most of them were very extrovert and party-lovers too.

Besides, I focused too much on my studies more than anything else and didn't realize the opportunities and that uni was the best place for dating , that was a mistake.

Where did you go to school? It wasn't like that where I went to school, none ever showed even remote interest in me.

Glad you've had some success, ToS.

Toadofsteel if its of any help this is of some of my experience and how i feel. By the way i havnt had that many bf's or experience, not in comparison to some girls or women;

Im am never joining no dating club. I guess i could. Its just it seems weird to me and i think i was a robot.
It would feel like i was being a robot and I might have autism but i dont like being restrained or repressed like a robot when it comes to dating. I'd rather be spontaneous. Like you meet some one, some where or through a friend whatever and they look at you and then you look at them and you know from that moment
there is something special. Thats it, its that twinkle in their eyes and its sexy. Then my eyes sparkle back and they grin. I love it, that look. It so intense.
I think one of my bf's smile was so beautiful and one of my bf's said i had one of the cutest smile he had ever seen on a girl.
People say i should smile more often because sometimes I am kind of serious or in a bad mood, just a little bit. I dont know if that is an aspie trait. Like having that serious discerning look or fixed expression. I know when i am happy. I always smile.
I dont know how or why i get in that happy mood, all day I am floating around like a feather smiling at everyone. Why am i like that and other times so opposite. It doesnt make sense and my mood swings really affect my life in that i feel i cant make any committments or keep in regular contact even with close friends.
Can any other aspies relate to this. I havnt felt secure to develop a relationship with no one in case i get in a really bad mood.
That isnt fair to the other person and when i am feeling like that I want them to go away. Maybe even for a week and i am not bothering explaining how i am feeling and meeting their emotional needs when i am not feeling like being caring.
I dont think i have always been like that but this year has been different and i have had no one but myself to get upset by. It's stupid. Going round and round in circles with a relationship with myself, in my head cause i dont wanna screw up some one else Its really boring and every guy i meet that shows interest i might to them too and then i just go cold cause all of sudden I am not in the mood and i dont wanna have a bf no more. I guess this is going to take me awhile to work out. I am just hope i am feeling back to being more myself next year because really Ive had enough!