Do you think this was unfair of my friend to do?

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Jamesy
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01 Feb 2009, 8:56 pm

I have AS and semantic pragmantic. Well I was walking back to a friends house with 2 of my mates and one my friends started making fun of the way I walk by copying how I walk. I walk with a lumbering stooped gait which can affect people with AS. Do you think this was unfair of my friend to do?



Tahitiii
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01 Feb 2009, 9:03 pm

Some people are really dense and insensitive.
Maybe he didn't mean anything by it and just didn't think.
Did you tell him that you didn't like it?



Jamesy
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01 Feb 2009, 9:08 pm

No I felt like punching him though. I am just being honest even though I know violence is wrong.



bonez
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01 Feb 2009, 9:09 pm

yeah my friends used to do that to me about "weird" things i would do because of my AS. they usually dont mean anything serious, they usually just do it as a joke..... NT's like to make fun of each other as a joke, i think.



Jamesy
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01 Feb 2009, 9:14 pm

My friend who was making fun of the way I walk had his own problems in his life though. So I don't wan't to be too harsh on him I guess.



Detren
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01 Feb 2009, 10:31 pm

Maybe he was just "picking" on you. Sometimes it can be a way to express affection.

Do you think he MEANT to be mean, or was it more playful like?



pensieve
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02 Feb 2009, 12:07 am

Just tell him that you don't like being made fun of. I got constantly picked on by friends because I often mispronounce words and stutter, and for my poor sense of direction.



Kaysea
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02 Feb 2009, 1:04 am

People do this sort of thing 'to' me quite a bit. Usually I don't notice that they are mocking me until someone points it out, though.



Jamesy
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02 Feb 2009, 9:50 am

Got loads of abuse at school for the way I walked in the past since I was quite lanky and awkward back then.



Jamesy
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02 Feb 2009, 10:35 am

To be fair to my friend maybe he was just trying ot help me or point out that I was walking funny so as not to do it so much in the future?



taintedangelboy
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06 Feb 2009, 12:40 am

Find something about them and make fun back.



DustinWX
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06 Feb 2009, 1:33 am

Just stop walking that way from now on and it won't be an issue. A friend of mine pointed that out to me the other day.



muffrudge
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09 Feb 2009, 4:01 pm

I have one friend in particular who points out and sometimes ridicules my odd mannerisms, for example saying 'Stop smirking to yourself! It's creepy!' when I have random funny thoughts which make me grin inanely even when i manage to refrain from bursting out laughing.

I personally don't like it either, but I accept what she says about there being no malicious intent in it. She is also renowned for causing offence by being too brutal with the truth with her NT friends. She is probably my closest friend and we have the most immense times together, so I discount this tendency. It happens less frequently now than it used to.

Perhaps it is a neurotypical tendency not to appreciate how painful it is to be ridiculed for such an intrinsic weakness. I just had to evaluate whether other aspects of this friendship compensated for these incidents.

On the positive side, having these oddities pointed out has ensured I do these things less.



RightGalaxy
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10 Feb 2009, 1:15 pm

It was very insensitive of him. But does he come through for you in a pinch?
I had a b***h friend when I was in my early twenties who often mocked me and would jump in bed with any guy who expressed the slightest interest in me BUT she actually risked her life to save me when I almost drowned. She couldn't swim but she tried to get to me as best as she could and then a lifeguard hawled us both in. She changed after that. She'd get a crazy look in her eye when she was about to poke fun at me for various things but would just stop herself before she did. Sometimes she would look at me and just start crying for no reason. We've lost touch. I haven't seen her in more than 20 years.