Has anyone been assessed and been told they are just normal?

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Hi,

I've been referred to an assessment centre and basically on the waiting list to be formally assessed/ dxed. Thing is i keep dreading that after the assessment the pyscologist will sit me down and say something like " son you are not aspergic/ autisitic, you're just a loner because you have difficulties communicating with people" or " your parents just didn't bring you up right and never taught you social skills" Obviously these are extreme examples and a doctor would (should) know how to be more tactfull.

So i'm just wandering if anyone here has been told that they don;t lie anywhere on the spectrum. Surely by the time the distress has led for you to approach a clinic, the whole assessment procedure is a formaility? I find myself sitting and trying to remember events in my life which i think are relevant to tell the pyschologist during the assessment. Will it matter that i've asked that they don't send the questionnaire to my parents cos i don't really want them to know anything until i've had my status confirmed. So basically everything will be based on my own autobiographical comments, and also a paeditrician's medical note from when i was 2 which says that i suddenly stopped talking and just had temper tantrums.

Will i not get a diagnosis on the technicality that i don't want to get my parents involved.

Sorry bout the long post, i'll appreciate any feedback

I think I have been told I was on the spectrum before but I am sure if I take the test now it would be quite the opposite. My symptoms seemed more severe in my childhood but now that I am grown up and out in the world I feel... quite typical.

Unless your parents shut you in a room for the early years of your life and never let you out, lack of social skills wouldn't have come from them. The psychologist probably won't say that then.

Not having your parents there may make it harder for the doctor to determine, but it shouldn't stop the process. I got an AS diagnosis with one parent not involved at all and the other denying it left, right, and center. The pediatrictian's note should help a lot though.

My first assessment, I was told I just had very low self-esteem. I'm going for re-assessment soon and dreading it as well...

It can be a bit if a boost to your confidence to be told you pass as 'normal', but if you still feel unhappy with your dx, then there's no harm in getting a re-assessment.

About the parents answering parents about your childhood. How far back do they define childhood? I mean i have an incredible autobiographical memory (one of the many reasons why i'm sure i am autistic) and can remember not fitting in when i was 6/7 years old. I'd even say i remember that time in my childhood even better than my parents.

I'm really uncomfortable bringing it up with my parents before i've been diagnosed and i've had time to assimulate the information for myself. Also, i'm actually away at university and getting my parents involved wouldn;t be at all trivial.

No, but then I had done a vast amount of self reflection BEFORE I did my own research and the correlations were too strong, so I was fairly confident when I went for my Dx at 40y/o.

Go and find the various online "Quizes", the Cambridge AQ, the Aspie Quiz and IIRC there may be others and take them all - and print out the results. That should help.

Fear of not passing the AS test is one of the two reasons (probably the more important reason) why I don't feel like being diagnosed.

It's a mixed result of getting knowledge of this subject. On the one hand I really know - at the least - that I have quite some AS traits. On the other hand I may get biased towards AS because it fulfils my need of belonging to a community, my need of having buddies. An objective doctor might rather stress that I'm biased.

By the way, the other reason for not being diagnosed is that there seems no real benefit for adults being diagnosed.

My first assessment said NLD, not AS. My second assessment (a huge insult!) said NLD with AS traits, not fully AS. My third assessment said, "High Functioning Autism-Moderate." My fourth and fifth assessments have just said, "Asperger's."

I just think it took a while for professionals to get the whole picture. I do come across pretty normal most of the time. My verbal IQ is 131 so I can impress people pretty well too. The thing is, my functioning level is far lower.

I don't know how low, though. I'm getting a sixth assessment to determine that.

So, if you don't get diagnosed the first time, add more info, bring your baby book, bring your parents, bring your friends, bring everything you can so you can get the right diagnosis.

no. i have never been told i am normal!
I got told there is absolutely absolutely absolutely no doubt i have AS by an AS specialist.
another time i got told i was "very likely AS" by another counsellor who was not an AS specialist.

My life history and my traits read like a textbook case of a woman with AS.

I am a series of special interests and my life is defined by special interests, intensity, sensory issues, repetitive routines and social struggles.

I am glad i know.