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JediFrogman
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25 Feb 2009, 7:47 pm

There are several women in the building where I work who I talk to in passing a lot. I would like to get to know these women, but I don't want to date them. I'm worried that if I ask them to have lunch with me, that they'll think I'm hitting on them.

What's the best way to do this as a friendly gesture, without making them think I'm hitting on them? Because I'm not.



Keeno
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25 Feb 2009, 7:49 pm

Try a coffee date - or coffee get-together since you don't wish to date them? It would depend on whether they're potential friends, or potential mere passing acquaintances.



nlc
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25 Feb 2009, 8:14 pm

Make it VERY casual. Wait until about 30 minutes before lunch and then casually walk by one of them (as if it's by chance) and say "Do you want to grab something for lunch today? I was thinking about going to ......"



Fnord
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25 Feb 2009, 8:24 pm

Better yet, approach two or three women, and say something like, "Where's a nice place to get coffee | a salad | pastry | a sandwich around here? I didn't bring anything for lunch."

Then offer to drive them there, order a light meal, pick up the tab, leave a generous tip, and drive them back.

I'd be shocked (shocked, I say!) if you didn't suddenly acquire a good reputation right away with all of your female co-workers.



Learning2Survive
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25 Feb 2009, 10:11 pm

Fnord wrote:
Better yet, approach two or three women, and say something like, "Where's a nice place to get coffee | a salad | pastry | a sandwich around here? I didn't bring anything for lunch."

Then offer to drive them there, order a light meal, pick up the tab, leave a generous tip, and drive them back.

I'd be shocked (shocked, I say!) if you didn't suddenly acquire a good reputation right away with all of your female co-workers.


good idea! a very friendly, polite, non-personal way to take a couple of decent women to lunch. at my workplace it's ok to go out to a bar together as group of 3+ (too bad i am staunch about abstaining from alcohol and won't swallow more than a table spoon of alcohol in a day) but if a female and a male go out for drinks together everyone looks at them funny.



Electric_Kite
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26 Feb 2009, 2:43 am

I'm pretty sure it's a date, no matter how casual, unless you take more than one or are good friends already.