""I can sense a deep hate and loathing for my presence""
Are you 100% sure that you are right? I have felt hated and
out of place many times, some of them it turned out later
it was me misunderstanding. The people you mention, if
they are strangers you haven`t met before it sounds unlikely
that they will start to hate you so fast. I have been hated for
real many times, some times for good reasons, but its the
thing with not letting people get to you, dont let them get
you down. I have made myself a rule, if someone acts all
pissy towards me and i dont know why, i first try to look at
it rationally, is it my fault? have i done anything that could
defend this attitude towards me? am i misunderstading something
here? If i`m confident that i can answer no to all three Q`s,
then i do my best to think "to hell with them, they want to be
pissy, fine, not my fault or problem". It helped a little, i managed
to not put myself down everytime i thought someone had a problem
with me. I do mistakes, but so do other people, dont assume its
your fault right away, maybe they`re just plain wrong and dumb.
Good luck, dont let them bring you down.
This actually happend a few days ago, a woman i knew some years
back stopped saying hello and just looks so incredibly pissed every-
time i see her, and everytime i feel bad and think "what have i done?"
Until last week. Then i met her again, she looked all pissy again and
didnt even give a basic polite hello and i had had enough. I felt
myself starting to worry and think, but then i thought "screw her,
i haven`t done anything, this is not my fault and it will not ruin
my day dammit!! ! now i`ll forget it and go and make some dinner".
it was nice