A Night at the Hospital, and a run-in with the police

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Hey guys...you'll never believe what happened to me last night...

All my mother simply did was give me a scolding that I felt was warranted for a SIX YEAR OLD...and I took 39 pills while on hold with crisis...needless to say, even I realized that this might have been a bad idea, so I told crisis about that. Naturally, they have to call for an ambulance in those situations, but what I keep forgetting is that in Wells, they send 2 cops over first to clear the situation.

Now, this wasn't the first time I was in such a situation, but this time, the 2 cops who were asking me questions *really* made me feel uneasy, like I was being interrogated for second degree murder. I just kept thinking that they were looking for ANY excuse to pound me or blow me away...it's a subtle form of rape, and BOY, don't they know it! I guess they were aware that this wasn't my first intentional overdose, so they had the right to be VERY WARY of my deeds and actions. The biggest scares I got were when 1.) I offered to go upstairs and get those medicine bottles, and they almost freaked out, telling me to stay where I was; and 2.) when I was outside, fearing they were gonna cuff me, they asked me if I had anything in my pockets. I said I could look, and went to put my hand in my sweatshirt pocket, but the cops stopped me yet again with verbal warnings, and again, I apologized for making them think that I was some sort of felon as they frisked me.

Well, the rest of the evening was rather uneventful; I rode to the hospital in an ambulance, drank some charcoal (which I chugged down like it was chocolate, to the surprise of the nurse that prepared it for me) and spent the night in the ER, sleeping it off. At this moment, I'm at my second oldest brother's house, writing this as I get ready for my appointment for my therapist, which oddly enough was assigned two weeks before this incident even occured, so what a convenience, eh?

Looking back, I can see why, playing the devil's advocate, why those cops treated me like that, even though my mom explained to them that I have Aspergers...they HAVE to assume that anyone who's suicidal can't be trusted to be left out of anybody's sight, or to put their hands in their pockets without the fear of them pulling out a weapon. But even so...I can never, EVER wear that sweatshirt, EVER again. Even though it was my only Christmas present last December, I can't keep it, knowing that a dirty cop's hands were in the pockets.

That's all I have to say for now...I'll add more if I remember anything.

Usagi1992

I do think that taking that many pills was a very bad idea, and kindof stupid...
I'm very sorry that you were so traumatized afterwards by what happened though, and I definitely think that this is something to discuss with the therapist. a lot.

Yeah, people can be real as*holes. Like all the other posters on this thread. Ignore them.

I too tried to commit suicide once, and I was arrested and locked in a cell overnight (all this for my own protection) I was strip-searched, fingerprints taken, DNA swabs... the works. That's horribly invasive for an Aspie, but to an extent a necessary evil. The real problem was lack of beds in the local psychiatric ward, which was why I spent a night at the leisure of the local police.

I completely sympathize- it's a situation where you need treatment, not to be made into a criminal.

And for the rest of you- ever had to deal with a serious mental illness? Thought not. F*ck you

Suicide takes the mystery out of death. You wonder your whole life how you're going to buy it and then you just pick one? Where's the discovery? Not the point, I know. Just one of the ways I talk myself out of driving off a bridge, from time to time, as it comes up. But how boring it would be to have died from swallowing some pills. Whoopie.

A reminder - this is the Haven. Please abide by the forum rules in responding.


M.

Why are people being mean and not supportive? I've had that same exact problem on this site. People would attack me when I'm down or even when I'm successful. He tried to kill himself for goodness sakes and you are not giving him support? I'm sorry that you feel this way. I've only tried to kill myself once and that was last year. I hate depression. I've been depressed for most of my life. If you still are a danger to yourself, you should go to the hospital. I had to go to the hospital several times. People attack me because I also have "schizoaffective" disorder. I don't know why they would attack me when I am having success with my art or speaking career though, that is just plain stupid. This board and one other I post at the people are nothing but mean you know whats.

I'm even too cowardly to commit suicide.

I am sorry to hear that you have had such a bad time, I have never tried to end it all or poison myself but I guess that the two things which you mentioned that the cops did was for both your good and their good.

1. When you offered to go up stairs and get the bottles of pills, they may have been thinking that as soon as you were out of their sight that you would eat some more pills or do something like try to lock yourself in a room.

2. When you reached for a pocket they will have had no idea what was in the pocket, they may have thought that you were about to pull out something which could hurt them. Bear in mind that a person who has just tried to poison themselves with pills might not be on the straight and narrow in terms of their thoughts.

British police are taught to hold the view that no person or arrest is risk free, while there might be the stereotype of the nasty young thug who will try to thump a cop who is trying to arrest him. They are taught that the harmless little old lady who is being arrested for the first time in her life will be very upset and that she might attack a policeman. So the cops may have been wanting to play safe with you, the idea of "no person is 100 % safe" is not an excuse to mistreat the general public but it is a good reason for the cops to not let you stuff your hands in their pockets.

I can think of quite a few household objects which a person might use to attack a cop, not just guns and knifes. If I was a cop I do not think I would like being on the wrong end of nail files, bunchs of yale keys and a range of other "harmless" objects.

I have no idea what you swallowed, but please do not do it again. Bear in mind that pills are not a surefire peaceful method of going to the over side, some common household pills will do nasty painful things to you which take a long time to kill you.

Please understand that life is a gift which you have been given, do not throw it away. What ever you feel about being told off by your mum, bear in mind that one day you will have the chance to make your own way in the world. If you kill yourself off as a teenager you are murdering the older version of you which could be happy and glad to be alive.

_________________
Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.

Firstly, I feel sad that you tried to kill yourself.

Secondly, I think the way the police and others treat people who are suicidal is totally out of order - some social worker was grilling me about all kinds of stuff when I was feeling suicidal, it was like the freakin' Spanish inquisition, I almost said, "Excuse me, bruv, do you moonlight as a cop or something? Cos you are acting just like every cop I've ever met!"

ANYWAY...

Hope you feel better.

To Woodpecker - Um, I'm not a teenager anymore...I'm *cough* 36 *cough*.

To 'irishwhistle' - your remark was kind of cold, but I guess I deserved it.

Now then, I feel now I should at least explain the why of my desperate call for attention; I don't call what I did suicide: I call it an affective way to separate myself from my family, since I can't drive. I figure, I'll get free r+b for a little bit while I calm down, so why not? heh.

Anyways, it all happened because my mother thought I was going to lay harm on the smallest of our 3 cats, simply because minutes earlier, I got upset when I stepped in its puke *in my bare FEET* while trying to get ramen. All I was doing was some vigorous petting, and saying things like 'you're a bad girl, aren't you?'...when my mother, seeing my hand around the cat's neck for a split second, said in the most serious of tones, "Don't you dare hurt her!"

That scared and intimidated the f**k out of me! I honestly do NOT lay harm to animals because of actions they do which they have no control over! But no, my mom honestly believes I AM the kind of cruel bastard that WOULD dish out harm to an innocent animal....

And that's why I took those pills. Pathetic, isn't it?

sorry if I sounded rude, that was not the intention.
I can understand wanting to get away from your family, but i really don't think that's the way to do it. Sorry, I wish I had some suggestions. I can understand your mom's side too, though. some people are paranoid, myself included. people I know have tried to commit suicide, cut, etc, and it basically scares me half to death, so that's going to be coloring all my replies. I'm sorry if I sounded mean earlier.


on a totally unrelated note, it sounds like there was a lot of misunderstanding happening at the time...

Dear Usagi1992,

Sorry if I was being a twit and making the assumption that you were a teenager, it was not intended as an insult. By the way your avatar looks rather youthful.

I have had cats and dogs over the years. I have loved the pets but I have got grossed out when I have opened a door stepped into a room and then discovered I have put my foot in cat or dog muck. Sometimes I have not been pleased with the animal for pooing in the house as it grosses me out.

_________________
Health is a state of physical, mental and social wellbeing and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity I am not a jigsaw, I am a free man !

Diagnosed under the DSM5 rules with autism spectrum disorder, under DSM4 psychologist said would have been AS (299.80) but I suspect that I am somewhere between 299.80 and 299.00 (Autism) under DSM4.